OOPs picture is clearly a photoshopped porkchop. Who even bothers with making this shit.
this post was submitted on 05 Feb 2025
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None of this is true. It's a piece of ham that looks mildly like a vagina, and someone came up with a funny story.
Do you think someone would do that? Just go on the Internet and lie?
Especially on a shitposting community? What’s the world coming to?
The audacity!
On the internet, no one knows you're a dog.
Hey! This guys a phony!
Phony!!
I gotta say, I did laugh though.
How can it be fake if it's not gay? Dude just ate pussy, that's as straight as it gets.
Fake: no silicone would deform like that at conventional cooking temperatures.
Gay: user's name is Callum.
Silicone no. But TPE, which melts ~170°C (~340°F) might. Still fake tho.
Welp, I am gullible enough to think it might be real
That's a heck of a lot more than mildly vulva
If it actually was attempted to be cooked in a skillet, a very, very different outcome and text message would have been shared.
Hey, what are the chances that's some actual Pig crotch? Isn't ham made from cured or dried pork?
Ham is made from the thighs of the pig
There's a non-zero chance a pig had a mutation where it had a vagina on its thigh, or thighussy as the kids would say.
I don't think putting something in a freezer would disinfect it. Stop the microbes from breading while it's inside, but they start again quickly as soon as it gets out.
It does depend. Some microbes die when being frozen, but generally heat is much more effective (though you probably shouldn't cook your Fleshlight and use some disinfection sprelay (etc) instead)
Ice crystals can and do rupture cells. But it's not a good method to disinfect as a lot depends on the freezing rate resulting in different crystal sizes.
Maybe OP had parasitic worms in his flesh light.
*googles "how to erase thoughts"
It's just a picture of Jack Daniels
I believe that's the search result for "how to prevent thoughts". Kinda similar, but there's a difference.
spaghetti!
True or not this shit killed me
Rip
How does one expect freezing to disinfect?
Freezing can kill bacteria, but only at temperatures far below what the standard freezer can reach. They do this for many seafood products sold commercially.
theres vegan meat?
There are a bunch of fake meat products intended for vegans. Fake steaks, fake thanksgiving turkeys. Usually made out of seitan (gluten), tofu, or mung bean proteins. I don’t think any of them resemble fleshlights…
My local pan Asian has had “vegan pork uterus” for ages.
Hmm, not bad. Bit salty...
How does one mistake a fleshlight for edible meat?
They don't because this is fake.