Person, easily. 1k roaches means i'm bound to find another 1k all around the house on the following weeks.
this post was submitted on 19 Dec 2024
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Roaches don't survive in my climate, bring 'em on. (Also, millennials have no idea what it's like to own a home so what's an "attic"?)
Person, easy
If I hadn't noticed them before now, then they're a spectacular neighbor
1000 half burned joints please.
A person. It's your property and you can have the police come and evict them. Very easy to do.
Roaches on the other hand...
Roaches, but I suppose enough bug bombs would work either way
A few hundred dollars will take care of the roach problem
The human is the biggest wild card situation yet and you're immediately going into fight or flight no matter what
Unless the person is there to kill me they win easily
Call police they leave issue solved.
Tell me you're not black without telling me you're not black
Oh absolutely, the person's relationship with the police definitely matters.
Lol.
All the person has to do to avoid arrest is be calm and assertive; if he insists that you invited him, that he paid you rent, that it's his house, here's the police response:
"That's a civil matter, you're going to have to call a lawyer."
If he's competent, he may even have a deed with the town's seal already in it. Anyone can file anything in the land records. It's up to title holders to protect their titles and clear any fraudulent entries.
Dead or alive?
I’ve had roaches before. I’d pick the person 10 out of 10 times.
Same.
1000 roaches? So like... more toys for my cat?
roach squishing noises
Only a hard choice if you've never dealt with roaches. 1000 roaches is enough to convince me that the house would never be free of them ever, roaches are incredible in the way they survive and thrive. Unless you made sure you killed every single last one and their offspring, you ain't getting rid of them.
And even then your neighbors need to be sure they have removed every roach. And their neighbors...
At least I know how to kill the roaches and dispose of the bodies. Plus, no one cares if I kill the roaches.
I live in an apartment building, I'll take the person. Roaches won't stick to the attic.
to think that there's probably someone in just about any city living with both.
how friendly is the person?
Average. The roaches are also average friendliness.
Do they chip in for rent?
a person, I only have to exterminate one large thing vs 1000 tiny things that could potentially crawl up my pee hole in my sleep.
no thanks.
How wide is your urethra that a roach can fit up there?
doesn't matter, they love warm moist dark cracks.
that's why they're called cockroaches
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Depends. Are they sexy?
spoiler
The roaches, I mean.
I don't think these are the e621 version of roaches
You can kill one person. You can’t kill 1000 roaches.
Bro, it's not a CEO, they have human rights.
But what if they are 🧐
In that case I definitely choose the 1000 roaches
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Person
Maybe if it was 10 roaches?
Person otherwise
Do we even know if this person has outside connections?
Maybe I can hire them pennies on the dollar
I would force them to do the work that I loathe doing when I web Dev, repeatedly making pages or posts or whatever, they get a home and wage I get to live happy
But what would happen to the person if they're not in my attic? I wouldn't want them to get run over by a trolley.
At least you don't have to explain roaches to the cops.
I have over 1000 dubia roaches in my house already. I’m going with them.
You don't have to brag about your cool friends here
I love these! My favorite one is, “if you were forced to shove a whole pineapple up your ass, as a matter of life and death, would you insert it top or bottom first?”
Keep in mind, you’ll need to get it back out once it’s in.
Bottom first. The leaves would serve as a flared end and a handle. You’d want it to be ripe-ish I imagine. Ripe enough to have a little give, but not ripe enough that the leaves come out too easily.
Pineapples also come in different sizes, I’ve seen some homegrown ones posted on Lemmy that seem…manageable.
I feel like you've given this an unusual amount of thought
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The roaches. At least you know their true nature, not surprising to find them there and, in days of high frustration, one can go up and stomp a few for that crunchy sound of bug demise.
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