this post was submitted on 24 Nov 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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[–] shatteredsword 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Second this, communism go brrr

[–] Kayday 7 points 1 day ago

As a lefty who received "gifts" from her conservative parents, let me suggest giving the gift separate from a major holiday. Something I wish my parents had done that could work as a gift of sorts for you would be to take your son out for coffee or breakfast. Nothing fancy, preferably not busy. Talk to them about why they think what they do. Don't combat them, just try to understand. Ask them if they would be comfortable talking more after you've had time to think about what they said.

"Hey [child's name], you know that we have strong beliefs about certain subjects. We feel we have good reasons to believe the things we do, but there are smart people in the world who disagree with us. You are a smart kid, and that is reflected in the way you look for answers to problems that the way you have been brought up to think hasn't offered a solution for. It would mean the world to your mom and I to know out son better, what are some things you've thought deeply about recently?"

[–] Kaiyoto 29 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Something that interests him other than fascism. Idk why that has anything to do with a gift. A gift is there to show appreciation and love, not to manipulate their pov.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

Yeh, this is a weird question. Kid has to know he's going to be accepted by his own Dad and still be able to make up their own mind on things. Hopefully when they've more fully developed they might sway a different way but acceptance from their Dad shouldn't really be conditional upon it.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I know, right? You can just get something else he's interested in. Like OP, maybe the kid likes antiquities, you could get him some from Benito Mussolini's 12000 piece collection in the Colonial Museum. Or maybe he likes art, you could buy him one of Hitler's paintings.

[–] LaLuzDelSol 21 points 1 day ago

So, what makes you think he's been taken in by fascist doctrine? Are we talking, "he thinks Dave Chapelle is funny and rolls his eyes at wokeness" or are we talking "defends hitler at the dinner table"? I ask just because I feel like some very liberal/leftist people can be pretty jumpy about things that are ultimately harmless. Additionally he might just be doing/saying things to act out and get a rise out of you. You're not gonna fix that by making him read "white fragility" or something.

As far as gifts go I agree with many others in suggesting something that will make him interact with other worldviews in the real world. Maybe you can get him into a hobby that is shared by people across many different socioeconomic backgrounds like basketball or martial arts or travel or something.

[–] chilicheeselies 17 points 2 days ago

When i was in ny early 20s, i was a Ron Paul guy. When I was in my early 30s, I was a Bernie guy.

So what changed, and what was the same? In my 20s, I didnt have a fundamental understanding of how money really works. Ron Paul was big on the gold standard, which makes sense kn the surface. Crypto is similar where it makes sense on the surface; finite supply means no inflation and no value loss. I somehow also reasoned that not having the gold standard was the cause of inequality, but I honeslty cant understand why, and i cant remember either.

In my 30s, I understood how they money system works mich better. Why we left the gold standard, and how it was holding back progress. I understood how our money is actually backed by muscle, and therefore the national debt doesnt really matter all that much until the day comes when the dollar has no value, because the US is defunct.

Im sure I have much more to learn as I am in my early 40s now.

The point I am trying to make, is that your son probably lacks understanding and wisdom, and is currently easily swayed by surface level logic.

Thisbis really in addition to the other great stuff people have said in here

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

unironically, some books on philosophy and more broad political sciences.

Assuming he isn't the stupidest person in the room at any given time, some good reading on philosophy and sociological structures (politics) will be interesting.

Don't ask me for recommendations, there are better places to go, and im sure a few people here will have good recommendations.

education is the single biggest thing preventing people from being more educated, funny how that works really.

[–] kava 13 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

let your children come to their conclusions on their own. do not try to force them into believing one thing or another. share what you believe is right and let them critically think and analyze the world for themselves

it's perfectly natural for teenagers to rebel against their parent's world view- especially when they feel like they are being forced into it. it's part of growing up and crafting your own unique identity. nobody has it all figured out when they are a teenager, even though they think they do. so they may seem arrogant and ignorant.. but that's perfectly normal. if you successfully imparted them the values of empathy and compassion when they were young, they will eventually come to proper belief systems

as for present, you know your son a lot better than any of us will.

[–] steeznson 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm a millenial but one of my most conservative friends has parents who are total left wing hippies. Sometimes kids end up rebelling or defining themselves in opposition to certain aspects of their family members.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

And sometimes, kids get less conservative with age. I did a u-turn in my mid-20s and am probably the furthest left in all of my family.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago

Reading through the comments here, I would say a gift certificate or membership to some activity they've expressed interest in. Ideally, something physical, that either involves working/playing/whatever with other people, or which has a social element to it.

My biased selection would be rock climbing if this is of some interest and you have a climbing gym that isn't a giant pain to access (which you might not). Solo sport, but a) you need a belayer - that was my Dad when I was doing it, and b) the gym rats I've come across are often very friendly, open people.

Can be as challenging as you make it, gets you talking with IRL people, opportunity for what sounds like really necessary quality time going up there, if he gets into bouldering or makes a gym buddy and can get there himself he can eventually do it independently, etc.

Might make sense for them, might not - only you would know, really.

[–] Horsey 8 points 2 days ago

Gen Z men that fall for the machismo of "hustling" just can't conceptualize the amount of financial difference between them and their idols. Get him something he can work towards making a hobby and hope that you can talk to him about why he thinks the way he does; listen and try to empathize and offer him an alternative solution to what he has forged for himself.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago

A turd.

If you want something that he would enjoy, Mein Kampft.

I mean, I'm sure at this point he has been exposed to most literature and works to not be a fascist, this won't get fixed with a gift. Maybe try to have a 1 on 1 conversation with him, let him speak an express why he thinks like that, let him go deep, let him talk about his feelings. Fascism always root on untrue information and resent. If he respects you, you can then talk about where he is wrong, confront the lies, but embrace him as a person.

If you want to win your son back, it will take real work, respect, and love. These people get lied to, and they believe because they are full of resent and want an explanation, someone to pin all the problems, an enemy. Uprooting that is hard, but sometimes family and friends can do it. If family and friends deepen those core beliefs, nothing is going to change.

Source: When I was younger, I was that stupid too. Friends made me realize it.

[–] enbyecho 109 points 3 days ago (7 children)

A plane ticket. Others have suggested he's bored and I concur. IMO, he needs to be intellectually challenged while simultaneously having his fears assuaged. Fear, I believe, is a key driver in pushing people toward fascist ideologies. Most likely he fears not being loved.

Traveling to countries with very different cultures can be both stimulating and reassuring, especially if it involves some significant challenge - a physical one like climbing a significant peak or somewhere that's just super hard to get to. You can demonstrate that you love and care for him by going with him. Just the two of you.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I concur. I noticed a lot of right wing people in the US never travel at all. They are only seeing and hearing information off of the Internet, colored by specific algorithms. If all you see of the world beyond your borders is through Fox news, you will have a skewed view.

Have him travel to another 1st world country, Europe, Japan or Canada, to see how people actually live there and there is nothing to fear.

Ideally, if you can afford it you can join him. I can wholeheartedly recommend a city like Antwerp, Copenhagen or Berlin for some history and also a relaxed atmosphere. If he's more into nature the Norse fjords, the Greek coast, Ibiza (combines nature with partying) or the Swiss Alps are all amazing.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I think this is the best one. It's a real, enjoyable gift recommendation that doesn't sidestep the parent's concerns about their kid

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[–] Furbag 22 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Some kids adopt an edgy political identity as a form of protest or rebellion. I can see this being the case here, especially if your whole family is particularly left-leaning. Kid wants to feel like he has an autonomy over his own decision making and that he's not just a carbon copy of you or his siblings, so he becomes a contrarian.

As a teen I was also taken in by extremist political ideology on 4chan, but the thing that snapped me out of that is, surprisingly enough, my curriculum at school focusing heavily on critical thinking and problem solving as essential skills. That's unfortunately not something that can easily be condensed down into a gift-sized package. I'm sure there are some books out there that can help, but I worry that it might be too on-the-nose or that he might just not like reading much to be interested in dry subject matter like philosophy or political science.

I kind of agree with other posters here that taking a family trip somewhere, maybe not explicitly as a gift for him, but as an experience for all of your children, will expose him to stimuli that drastically differ from the way he currently sees the world, which is influenced by a nonstop stream of fearmongering propaganda and a lack of perspective of what a world outside the town or city he grew up in actually looks like.

[–] [email protected] 194 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Doing political stuff for Christmas is one way to ensure you have a nazi kid forever. Just ignore the politics, give a normal gift. Love will conquer all the hatred that he has. Good luck.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Normal gift, yes.

Love conquers all? This isn't a Hallmark movie, yo. Have a chat after Xmas. If you have the presence of mind to see your kids supporting shit we literally fought wars over, you don't pat them on the head and say "ah it'll be fine".

Be a good parent; talk to your kids.

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[–] Dead_or_Alive 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Have your son travel, sending him off to see how other people live and how cheerful and helpful most people are is probably going to open his eyes.

  1. Puerto Rico, Bahama’s, St Lucia, British Virgin Islands are all fairly safe and you can mix and mingle with the locals. Just don’t stay somewhere where you will only stay on the resort. Get a hotel or resort in the middle of a community

I had a wonderful time in St Luca several years ago and stayed at the resort below. It’s a small resort in the middle of a town with lots of interaction with locals.

https://coco-resorts.com/

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[–] daggermoon 130 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Ignore all the joke answers here. It seems insensitive given the subject matter. He's probably lonely and feeling left out. If he has siblings it's all the more likely. I was an alienated teenager who was in a place similar to your son I think. I eventually realized I and many others we're being used to further the agenda of some unsavory fucks who wanted to send us back to the 1860's. Try to show him how much he means to you. Let him know you care about him. Just don't drive him away, Show some love and compassion and he'll realize he's drinking the kool-aid eventually I think. Hope this helps, good luck!

[–] Clinicallydepressedpoochie 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Also, should work with him emphasizing that politics isn't really about having a party but before that, having an ethos. At the end of the day you need to evaluate how your ethos aligns with the parties actions, not ideas. I can't believe anyone today is conservative as I had once known them because I know the GOPs actions align only with obtaining power. Unless your ethos is "fuck you i got mine" the GOP offers you nothing. Which also means that you've already got yours. Which, looking at conservatives, I have my doubts. And if they don't have theirs, well then it's just, "fuck you." Which I can understand why a teenager would feel that way.

[–] daggermoon 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Barry Goldwater wouldn't recognize what his party has become. He tried to warn them. He pretty much predicted the rise of Christian nationalism.

"Mark my word, if and when these preachers get control of the party, and they're sure trying to do so, it's going to be a terrible damn problem. Frankly, these people frighten me. Politics and governing demand compromise. But these Christians believe they are acting in the name of God, so they can't and won't compromise. I know, I've tried to deal with them." - Barry Goldwater

[–] Clinicallydepressedpoochie 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

I know almost zero about berry goldwater but know with a stark certainly you will never catch a current conservative saying anything like that. To think, goldwater was probably as prominent a figure as john mccain.

[–] daggermoon 2 points 1 day ago

He was the Republican presidential candidate in 1964. He ran against Lyndon B. Johnson. He was a very well respected man in the party. I'm not going to pretend he's the greatest politician of all time. I definitely have ideological differences but I respect him for what he fought for.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago

Plane ticket to Peru and a Ayahuasca retreat

[–] [email protected] 77 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (4 children)

Specifically try to get him into some hobby or social activity that will draw his attention away from the fasc stuff. Was there anything he used to love, any friends he's drifted away from that you could try and get him talking to again through a shared activity?

Source: am psych nurse. You don't confront / directly argue with delusions and other thoughts related to maladaptive social behavior; you subtly reduce their attractiveness while encouraging healthy human connection.

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[–] [email protected] 49 points 3 days ago (1 children)
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[–] Norin 19 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Do you know if the doctrine he’s been taken in by is religious or secular in nature?

I ask because I could recommend some books you could get him that just might get the kid to think a little harder about things.

For context, I teach philosophy and religion for some community colleges and have been looking for ways to get these Gen Z alt right boys to quit the propaganda.

While a lot of them seem to be lost causes, there are some who can be challenged to read outside their sphere, so long as what I give them isn’t too overtly “other.”

Depending on what he’s into, there might be some authors who know how to talk to an oppositional reader.

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[–] Duamerthrax 45 points 3 days ago (1 children)

If he's consuming right wing social media, it might be because he's bored. Others have suggested left wing media, but maybe just finding other activities to do would help. These cost money, but maybe camping/hiking, hobby electronics/combat robots, dirt bikes/go-karts, RC planes/drones or metal fabrication are ideas that come to my mind. These are hobbies that have either politics neutral or left leaning communities. If he picks up that you're trying to politically influence him, he'll likely dig his heal in.

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[–] Hikermick 31 points 2 days ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago

The Wall (the full album) by Pink Floyd

[–] loomi 29 points 2 days ago

Voucher for 1 free vasectomy?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (8 children)
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[–] [email protected] 61 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Why is his political opinion important for a Christmas present? Just give him something he'd like.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

And if all he wants for Christmas is an ethnically homogeneous fatherland?

Just stick to socks I say.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

An extremely late term abortion

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Nah. Kids are easily influenced.

You take 100 kids and feed nazi propaganda all the time. 99 of them will become nazis.

We all hate nazis, but if you were put in the same environment as the nazi, chances are, you'll become a nazi.

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