An SEO specialist walks into a bar, saloon, watering hole, place to get drinks, neighborhood bar, dive bar, best mixed drinks, beer on tap...
this post was submitted on 01 Nov 2024
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Damn. Need to wrap that whole bar in a try: except: that just silently fails. Solves all the issues and you go to another bar.
In my experience silently failing just leaves you standing there waiting for your beer forever, or until someone reboots the universe.
“But if it silently fails then we won’t know there’s a problem until a customer reports it and we go looking for it!”
Yes, and that could be weeks before it becomes my problem again!
And weeks later, after that change has been rolled out to all the bars, the engineer now has to travel to every single one of them to fix it.
Customer: Can i use the bathroom?
Bartender: Ehhhh our bathroom is not available at the moment.
Customer: What?
Bartender: Not. Available...
def bathroom(customer): return False
Exception:
Spits out entire codebase
Thank god, finally a bar that sells lizards and kills people who spend to much time in the bathroom, this place is perfect.
I'm reading this while sitting on the toilet. Do I have anything to worr... Oh fuck! I'm on fire! Help!
lesson: santize your bartenders inputs but also use hierarchical rbac to provide guests access to querying for amenities.
A developer walks into a bar and orders one Budweiser'); DROP TABLE bartenders;
A table falls over and drops on the foot of the developer
Isn't it weird that their job title is QA Engineer when their goal is to break stuff?
QA Terrorist?
Who else is going to engineer the tools to break stuff?
Did they order Bobby Tables beers though
Bobby ordered beers for the table, stack overflow caused them to black out
Don't forget to order null beers, and " DROP TABLE * BEERS
I've played enough games to know that he definitely forgot to check for integer overflow errors.
that's the big number