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rOzeclawz Follow 2d ago
what the fuck makes phone apps so cocky as to send me notifications telling me to use it. my grocery list app straight up went "you havent made a list in a while!" are you out of your fucking mind. you are a program. why are you speaking to me like youre my equal. i could replace you with a pen and the back of a receipt. idiot. i kill you now
similar energy:
It makes me more angry that it should that Alexa talks back to me when I ask it to do stuff.
“NOW CONNECTED TO YOUR PHONE!”
YES I FUCKING KNOW BECAUSE YOU MADE THE BEEPING NOISE YOU MAKE AND THAT’S OK BUT DON’T FUCKING TALK TO ME
Your problem is having an Alexa in the first place. That's a simple fix, though. Your local recycling center will take e-waste.
The worst are apps that send ads through notifications.
That's an instant uninstall for me
The worst is when an otherwise great app does that! And they also send really important notifications too, so you can’t just disable notifications!
Many apps have "notification channels" (on android), to customize what notifications you get. You could choose to disable some notifications and keep others.
Are apps able to lie though? Say, by putting ads into the same channel as essential notifications?
Yes and some do it constantly. Other have say two channels and just name them like “important stuff” and “really important stuff” and just mix ads in both.
There was a time, when the Amazon App complained every time you opened it (and every few pages of browsing) that not all notifications were allowed and constantly nagged you to turn them on, if you disabled any categories in the app or notification channels.
Yeah so the feature actually sounds completely useless against a determined adver~~sary~~tiser. At the very least, apps should have no way of knowing whether notifications are turned on, including no means of knowing whether a notification was displayed or not.
App stores should also make a policy of banning apps that don’t explicitly keep all their ads in an advertising channel.
Send a bug report every single time it happens.
Issue #363 - My phone notified me about an add
Issue #366 - My phone have notified me about ads twice
Issue #372 - My phone have notified me about ads three times
That's the good stuff.
You forgot the ones that decide they need to play their own sounds to accompany the notification.
It took exactly one time of the Taco Bell app making my phone do their stupid bong sound for me to swear off taco bell for life.
making my phone do their stupid bong sound
-Rapid bubbling- -Short burst of coughs- “Bruh, we should totally get munchies.”
No, their stupid bong sound. Not a welcome bong sound.
I’m looking at you ESPN
One more reason why i prefer Open Source. There, apps get made for utility, not for money.
And popularized by utility, not profit or market share
Or ad campaigns! Don't forget terrible products that are popularized by ads alone!
Any app that does shit like that immediately loses notification privileges. At the very least. If it's something that I don't need (thanks for reminding me, app), then I will just remove it.
I wish there was a more punitive option. Like, yeah, I disallowed notifications, but I also had a leaky gallon of liquid shit delivered to the CEO's home.
It's the only thing worse than getting interrupted using the app asking for me to review it
Three seconds after you start it for the 1st time
I do review them when they pull that bullshit, I give them 1 star.
This is why on newer Android versions you can just flat out reject being allowed to send notifications.
I will talk to you when I need it, not the other way around.
I had no idea people didn't do this! First notification I get from an app that isn't some form of messaging, straight to settings and turn off notifications.
People are getting notifications from news apps. Apart from actual World War Fuckin Three, what possible news story could be worth being disturbed by your phone for?!?
Well before the current Android version, you had to manually go into the settings of the app or your phone to disable them. Now you get this on first boot of the app:
This makes it a lot easier to reject them immediately
This. I shut off all notifications from nearly all of my apps. Primary text app, phone app, and just a couple of others. I may temporarily allow them for a special purpose, but once that's over they all get silenced and I get to them when I get to them. I hate badge notifications, too. So, those are off for EVERYTHING. Grad school cemented that aversion.
"You haven't given us your data in a while!"
Sometimes I put directions into Maps for a work thing and I have to be there before the location opens to the public and when I put the address in, before it will give me directions, the app says, "HEY, THE PLACE YOU'RE GOING MIGHT NOT BE OPEN, JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT WANT TO KNOW, STUPID ASSHOLE."
It makes me unreasonably(?) furious.
I get this happen to me too, but honestly it feels like a feature that helps more people than it annoys the rest. Even though I'm among those annoyed
It's like when customer service call centers have 'longer than average wait times" because of "higher than average call volume" all of the fucking time. If it happens all the time, it ain't higher than average.
Breh my job involves driving to addresses outside of their normal working hours to the general public . It is so f u c k i n g annoying to have to listen to day in and day out. Same with "traffic is heavier than usual". Also every. Damn. Day at the same time of day.
I changed my first name in part because of this kind of nonsense. In the old days companies would refer to you as Mr. Surname, these days they're gross and chummy. Stay in your lane, we're not friends, you can use my paperwork name that I have no emotional connection to.
I'm using more and more "master" as a first name online. That helps a lot.
Hey Flamekebab, why aren't you meeting your commitment to practice swahili for 40 minutes a day :(
App developers should learn that the "Maybe later" button makes me delete their app.
Yes or no.
It increases engagement and that's what the developer wants, especially if there are ads or purchases in the app. So you might hate it but it works.
Damn engagers, ruining it for the rest of us.
I hate how app send notifications constantly now. It's gotten to the point where I'll just uninstall it if it annoys me.
Turn on "do not disturb" permanently. That's what I did
Setting my phone to silent semi-permanently was a great decision. The sound of sensation of buzzing has become something I dread. Do not "ping" at me, machine. I will check for messages when I am bored, and no sooner!
I AM A DIVINE BEING
DATA me NEED DATA
the only apps that are allowed to speak to me are messengers, weather, and my bank. Nothing else has speaking privileges.