this post was submitted on 14 Sep 2024
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Dad Jokes

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Open the door, put the elephant into the refrigerator, and close the door.

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[–] [email protected] 66 points 2 months ago (1 children)

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator?

Open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in and close the door

[–] toomanypancakes 51 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The lion, king of all the animals, holds a meeting for all the animals and everyone shows up but one. Who's missing?

The giraffe! They're still in the refrigerator.

[–] [email protected] 48 points 2 months ago (2 children)

You need to cross a river that’s home to crocodiles. How do you get across safely?

You simply swim across. All the crocodiles are at the lion’s meeting!

[–] Retreaux 8 points 2 months ago

Oh my god this is my favorite joke chain! I use it at least once a year

[–] NeoNachtwaechter 4 points 2 months ago

But why don't you use the bridge?

[–] [email protected] 34 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

(I love when I get to post these joke chains)

How do you get 4 elephants in a mini cooper? -Two in the front, two in the back.

How do you get 2 whales in a mini cooper? -Take the M4 and go over the Severn bridge.

How can you tell there's an elephant in your fridge? -Footprints in the custard.

How can you tell there's 2 elephants in your fridge? -You can hear them giggle when the light goes out.

How can you tell there's 3 elephants in your fridge? -You can't quite get the door shut.

How can you tell there's 4 elephants in your fridge? -There's a mini cooper outside.

[–] jewbacca117 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The whales one took me a second!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Well if you got it could you explain? Idk what the Severn bridge is. My phone evidently does by making it a capital letter though.

[–] jewbacca117 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Think of countries in the UK

And M4 is a highway, not a tank

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

Ah, thanks.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

Severn bridge goes over Severn river, which is part of the border between England and Wales. The M4 goes from London to South Wales

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

It's more of an antijoke than a dad joke.

[–] owenfromcanada 0 points 2 months ago

Check the other comments :)

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

I hate that I'm subscribed to this community 😄

[–] dagodemon 9 points 2 months ago

What time is it when an elephant sits on your sofa? Time to buy a new sofa.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

I'd reward you with an elephant ear sandwich for this joke, but I'm fresh out of those giant buns.

[–] thenextguy 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Fit an elephant in a refrigerator where?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Not in the egg compartment, of course, but most other places will do.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Yeah. An elephant won't stay crisp in the egg compartment.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (2 children)

How do you fit a thousand elephants onto a small driveway?

You take the "i" out in drive and the "f" out in way.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Spell it out and say it out loud.

The punchline is more satisfying if you discover it versus being told.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Explanation:

spoilerThere is no effin' way

[–] NeoNachtwaechter 1 points 2 months ago

Yes, very much so!

[–] NeoNachtwaechter 2 points 2 months ago

But dad, there is no...