this post was submitted on 20 Feb 2024
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TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name

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[–] psycho_driver 38 points 9 months ago (3 children)

That's one aspect in which The Orville was certainly more realistic than Star Trek. Their security officer was using their holodeck to fulfill his smutty gay sex fantasies.

[–] Stamets 30 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Haven't seen Lower Decks yet, I'm guessing?

The pilot episode has Mariner load an all nude male Olympic gymnastic facility lol

[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago (1 children)

She's also punished, at one point, by having to clean the holodeck "bio filters."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

🎶 Boogers and Cum! 🎶

[–] teft 19 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Also VOY has Tuvok using the holodeck for ponfarr.

[–] Stamets 12 points 9 months ago (1 children)

True but at least there was a medical reasoning behind that one and not just "abs.... yummy...."

[–] teft 9 points 9 months ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Also in DS9 IIRC it's implied Quark's holosuites are full of smut

[–] teft 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago
[–] spittingimage 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Not Tuvok, a Vulcan officer from Engineering. And it didn't exactly solve his problem.

[–] teft 9 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

100% Tuvok. He complains to Tom Paris about his hologram wife T'Pel's ears being too short.

You can see her referenced here.

[–] spittingimage 3 points 9 months ago

Huh. I might have skipped that episode.

[–] CptEnder 10 points 9 months ago

"and holodeck waste removal"

"Urgh is it really mostly #$&!?"

"Oh yeah, it's all #$&!..."

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago

This is a recurring theme in DS9. Quark is always offering new programs like "pleasure mazes" with a "surprise" at the center. Nog even has his own program with a "pleasure goddess".

[–] banichan 3 points 9 months ago

Red Dwarf, too 😉

[–] FlyingSquid 20 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Dude. Rap doesn't exist in the 24th century. Only classical music.

[–] negativenull 25 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] FlyingSquid 13 points 9 months ago (1 children)

How could I not remember?!

[–] negativenull 17 points 9 months ago
[–] Stamets 17 points 9 months ago

And hard rock or metal thanks to Mariner and Tendi

[–] teft 11 points 9 months ago

Klingon Acid Punk also exists...

[–] teft 16 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

I would make celebrity deathmatches in claymation.

Kahless vs Plato should be interesting.

Or Shran vs Napoleon

Her Most Imperial Majesty, Mother of the Fatherland, Overlord of Vulcan, Dominus of Qo'noS, Regina Andor, Philippa Georgiou Augustus Iaponius Centarius vs Elizabeth II by the Grace of God, of Great Britain, Ireland and the British Dominions beyond the Seas, Queen, Defender of the Faith

You know, all the good matches you can think of.

[–] Stamets 9 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Georgiou vs Liz 2?

Oh my god.

I never knew I needed anything more.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

I’d recreate Napoleon and the Battle of rabbits just for fun

[–] aarRJaay 15 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Anyone else remember the YouTube series - "Epic Rap Battles From History?" - We need an AI to do the Star Trek version.

[–] psycho_driver 15 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

They shall never be forgotten. The Hitler vs. Vader battles are great, as is Hawkings vs. Einstein. The latter delivered one of the sickest rap battle lines of all time:

There are ten million, million, million, million, million, million, million, million, million particles in the universe that we can observe.

Your mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd!

[–] TheDoozer 5 points 9 months ago

Jefferson vs. Douglass was good enough that I started it over and watched it again. Same with Ivan the Terrible vs. Alexander the Great.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

They're still around. They did a really good Karl Marx vs Henry Ford rap a couple of months ago.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Yeah, their production rate slowed down a lot because of a good thing - they managed to get out from under Disney.

[–] LemmyIsFantastic 13 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Why would any sane person who served on an enterprise want more excitement in their lives?

I'd choose simple shit too missy the time. That and porn. They got to have some interesting rules on that.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Surely the holodeck can clean up without a trace? Or for "rules", are you thinking more about the kinds of programs that are ok?

[–] AA5B 3 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Why wouldn’t just about anything be ok? Using real character of someone on ship would be some sort of violation, but after that, even knowing someone’s holodeck preferences could easily be a breach of privacy

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Hate to go there but I can't think of other examples. Cartoon sexual images of children are illegal in many countries. So you can imagine there might be limits despite it not being real.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Privacy doesn't excist on a starfleet ship. They'll search your private log and the doc will tell them anything about your medical history if your 5 minutes late to the pickup after the latest mission

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You could pull off a shitty version of now it using the various LLM AIs and Sora.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

The final frontier.

[–] AA5B 9 points 9 months ago

Doing a random battle turns the characters into your puppets. I suppose there’s novelty but that’s boring.

Playing cards facilitates conversation, where the character’s supposed personality shines through, and strategy, where you can see how such a character might play. Much more interesting.

Star Trek characters, as you move to the later series are much more cerebral, fascinated by mental gymnastics more than physical

[–] trolololol 4 points 9 months ago

Sounds like a plot for lower decks, but boiimler pisses off Surak and Kahless walks out of holodeck like EMH does.

[–] Pirky 4 points 9 months ago

This is the true purpose of AI.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The Doc tried to do more on Voyager, and accidentally turned himself into a psychopath lol

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

He was messing with his own core programming though, adding subroutines from holodeck characters to his own, rather than really doing cool things with the holodeck itself.

The holonovel episode of voyager would be a better example, imho, of using the holodeck for something interesting. It wasn’t even really intentional, but then it was implied that became a big intentional thing after.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

I love that they had multiple members of the crew get into making holonovels, and they had different styles and tastes. One thing I wish Star Trek did more was look at what art would be like in the Federation. We only ever see Vulcan stuff really. I imagine it's hard to do art plotlines on a science show though