this post was submitted on 01 Mar 2024

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Fox News guest decrying “migrant crime” previously arrested after getting violent over a grilled cheese sandwich he deemed too cheesy (www.mediamatters.org)

submitted 10 months ago by [email protected] to c/nottheonion

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...

A man wanted just two slices of cheese on his sandwich, so when his wife used three slices in his grilled cheese sandwich, he became irate.

Angered at the sight of all the extra cheesiness, James DePaola became agitated and violent, yelling at the woman, Michele DePaola. According to WSB-TV, DePaola then ripped the landline out of the wall so his wife couldn’t call the police and reportedly screamed at her intensely. The couple’s 12-year old daughter who witnessed the incident called the police to the scene, according to Athens-Clarke County police.

James DePaola was charged with obstruction of a 911 call and criminal trespass/damage to property over what the police now refer to as “the grilled cheese incident”. DePaola has a history of “abusive behavior,” and was often “excessively critical and controlling of day to day things in life” like sandwiches, apparently.

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[–] Zahille7 165 points 10 months ago (8 children)

This man is not a true American, as there is no such thing as a "too cheesey" grilled cheese.

[–] Lauchs 65 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Lotta people are saying he wasn't even born here. All I'm asking is if he IS a real American, why haven't we seen his birth certificate? Just asking questions here...

[–] III 40 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Tucker Carlson: "Many people are saying he isn't an actual American. If not, who is he? Is he a Russian spy? And if so would he like to come over to my home to discuss Putin's dreamy eyes and masculine physique? I am just asking questions here."

[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago (1 children)

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

We can't accept drum 'n' bass. We need jungle I'm afraid.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I always preferred jungle, dnb has a nice head bopping groove but jungle is much more fun, of course doesn't always apply. I have no idea what the parent comment is about just wanted to add my opinion on some nice beats.

The ready or not dnb remix from the late 90s was the shit though.

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife 3 points 10 months ago

My comment was based on this video, which the pic of the botoxed Tucker Carlson reminded me of. I also prefer jungle to dnb - but I like big beat best of all.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago

Just asking questions here

JAQing off in public

[–] raynethackery 11 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Yes, with a nice bowl of tomato soup.

[–] cheese_greater 1 points 10 months ago

Too much tomato soup of bowl /s

[–] VindictiveJudge 10 points 10 months ago

I'm lactose intollerant and even I can confirm this.

[–] FartsWithAnAccent 6 points 10 months ago

Sounds like a commie spy!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Not to mention the fact that most grilled cheese sandwiches use American cheese. This guy hates America!

[–] 1D10 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What if the cheese is Brie?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Get that French shit outta here.

Unless you’re making your grilled cheese on brioche. Maybe some sliced pear. Or fig. Make that shit gourmet.

[–] Alexstarfire 1 points 10 months ago

I disagree. I think almost are all too cheesy. I'm serious. This is why I don't really eat grilled cheese.

[+] [email protected] -10 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (4 children)

The problem actually lies in the “cheese” slices. THEY AREN’T CHEESE .

I’d be pretty irate if I got served that stuff in a cafe.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

well, that's not entirely true, they aren't eclusively cheese

[–] Jarix 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

RedNile (or BlueNile?!) disagrees with you

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

I mean they're not pure cheese but they definitely contain real cheese. As fun as it was watching Nile Blue mess around, the recipe to make fancy versions of American cheese with fancy cheese (that is practical to do at home) has been known for a long time.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

You are correct, it's "pasteurized processed cheese product," but for brevity most of us just call it cheese.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

One of the many things I do not miss from living in the US is the range of ersatz foods which have replaced the real thing in the popular market.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

I'm generally not a fan of the stuff, but one of the few places American "cheese" is good is a grilled cheese sandwich.

I'd still prefer a sharp cheddar myself, but American is acceptable.