this post was submitted on 01 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 308 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (27 children)

My wife, to this day, shuts off the shower and then immediately steps out while water is still running off her soaking wet body, inevitably creating a puddle in the bathroom.

"Honey, why don't you drip for like five seconds, or even grab the towel and give yourself a quick dab before you get out?"

The first time I told her this she just stared at me for a solid 20s while her brain rebooted. But then her "never admit anything ever under any circumstances" instinct kicked in and she responded "wow are you really policing my shower habits?"

So anyway, now she knows better, but still does it because marriage is about compromise, or something.

[–] [email protected] 81 points 8 months ago (8 children)

I give myself knife hands over my body before going for the towel. Towel stays significantly more dry and I can use it several times before it needs a wash.

[–] WhoIsTheDrizzle 35 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I got ridiculed for doing this by my partner. I do it very quickly and vigorously, it just makes a ton of sense to me; I end up being dry faster and more efficiently than going straight to the towel.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Sometimes it's okay to tell your partner to go fuck themselves.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Just give them a vibrator/fleshlight, same message but more constructive.

[–] Lev_Astov 23 points 8 months ago (3 children)

I can use it several times before it needs a wash.

Look at this guy over here, washing his towels.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago

This is it, my least favorite comment chain today

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago

alt-text: relevant Dilbert

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart 5 points 8 months ago

That’s how you fuck up your towel mushroom harvest.

[–] A_Very_Big_Fan 6 points 8 months ago

The good ol' hand squeegee

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

I just shake like a dog for a good 10 seconds.

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[–] [email protected] 73 points 8 months ago (3 children)

I squeegee my whole body with my hands before stepping out

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago

I call it knife hands.

[–] Amazinghorse 3 points 8 months ago

Me too! No pools of water on the floor, no wet towel after 1 shower.

[–] RampantParanoia2365 2 points 8 months ago

Me too. At least my head if not everything.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 8 months ago (2 children)

It's a good thing she's not single, I would hate being in a relationship with your wife!

[–] cone_zombie 9 points 8 months ago

Thank you for your service, OP

[–] Chriszz 5 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Anyone whose first instinct is to get defensive when offered good faith advice… yeah keep em away from me

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[–] [email protected] 31 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I dry myself completely while still in the shower and it's a mystery to me why not everybody is doing this.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Because sometimes I leave the towel hanging on the door hook :')

[–] RampantParanoia2365 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 26 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Am I the only one who lays a towel out on the floor in front of the shower? This thread has me thinking what I thought was standard practice might not be.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Yes, because other people have bath mats...

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago
  • Hang towel over shower screen.
  • Shower.
  • Turn off water.
  • Wipe water off body.
  • Towel dry.
[–] RampantParanoia2365 18 points 8 months ago

A (very smart and educated) girlfriend once told me it was so smart how I actually dry off my body with the towel instead of just wrap myself and wait for myself to dry naturally. We only have 4 limbs.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] Nikki 22 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 20 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Excellent username! I needed a reminder that losing is Fun™️ this morning.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

She reminds me of my 3rd ex wife.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

"I am dumbass, quit soaking the bathroom."

[–] BrotherL0v3 3 points 8 months ago

Oh shit, I do that too! Never occurred to me to stand there and drip for a minute. 😅

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

I do this out of habit

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