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How do long time married couples with a single income split finances (not seeking legal advice, literally the how) (self.asklemmy)

submitted 1 year ago by peopleproblems to c/asklemmy

10 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I'm talking like one person brought in all the money for a decade, then a divorce happens. Some of it makes sense - a house with mortgage, one spouse buys the other out of the house. Which is great, but if one spouse doesn't have the income to take a loan out to buy the other, does that mean that the spouse who does have the income has the choice to buy out or sell?

Similarly, things like 401ks and pensions I imagine you can't just take out half the cash in them and give that to their spouse. Or does that have to be a loan for the amounts in those plans?

Is it debt all the way down for both?

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[–] RBWells 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I got an email from my bank saying that life insurance was important for stay at home spouses, because if you had to hire for all of the stuff they do, it would run you at least 60k a year. Nanny, maid, accounting, cooking.

My boss just got divorced. Her husband never worked, got disability, did cook and drive the kids some but not at the level another working parent would have done (disability). They had lawyers and just split everything up but she also has to pay him spousal support for ten years. She keeps her 401k in this arrangement (I don't know how much of it predates the marriage, that might be a factor) but they had to sell the house and didn't make much on it. Thankfully her kids graduated this year and she's gonna be ok.