It's quite literally the medical term.... i... I am an obese man, I am an obese man mostly of my own doing, their might be some psychological or socioeconomic reasons, but it's mostly the fact that food is good, exercise sucks, and impulse control. I wasn't born this way, I wasn't treated as nonhuman for something beyond my control, and obese is not used for the sole purpose of being derogatory.

Those two words are very, very different. Even if you are obese because of a thyroid, or injury, or whatever, a doctor can, and will call you obese in your medical reports. And if you can't handle that because you can't handle that slight uncomfortability, no wonder you are still obese.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I've been bedbound for five years. I have managed to stay a healthy weight by harassing my mother every time she buys unhealthy food. I ain't got that kind of self-control!

[–] wolfpack86 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Apparently you do?

[–] Cypher 25 points 3 months ago

Self control is a lot easier to exercise when you remove the immediacy. If a bag of chips are next to you not eating them can be really hard.

Not buying them in the first place? Usually much easier.

[–] Lemminary 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Yeah, it's a sterile medical term that unfortunately takes on other meanings that people dislike. For example, I had a friend who went off the deep end and started claiming that obesity was made up by doctors and began trying to convince me to think likewise. It was kind of eerie to see this otherwise rational person fall for this type of denial over something that made them uncomfortable.

It doesn't help that some doctors were shitty to him about his weight (a fair and very real complaint) so he insisted it was a systematic problem within the medical establishment to oppress. I don't doubt it happens but it's a bit extreme to think it's solely used to that end and that it's not a handy label for managing weight and conducting research.

[–] Guy_Fieris_Hair 8 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I do agree that if you are obese and have unrelated medical issues the doctors will very much say "you need to lose weight", and call it done. And that is x10 if you are a woman, for some reason. Yeah, these problems may not be so bad if I was not obese, and they may not have existed is I wasn't (bulging disks my back, in my case etc.), but the truth is, I am fat, I still need my problems fixed, go ahead and do the surgery to trim the disk that is pinching my nerves to fix my back because otherwise I can't move and I will just get fatter and my back will just get worse. Perpetually.

It is just laziness and they have a blanket scapegoat to use to get out of doing their job if you walk in and are overweight.

[–] catbum 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

It is just laziness and they have a blanket scapegoat to use to get out of doing their job if you walk in and are overweight.

(Please take the following as pondering general discussions of obesity between doctors/patients and not specifically directed at you.)

This was a really thought-provoking summary for me, your belief that doctors are telling people to lose weight out of "laziness." If a suggestion like this is lazy, are patients who don't listen to their doctor somehow not lazy?

The idea that doctors make weight a scapegoat seems prevalent in American healthcare (probably because we're generally obese). It feels a lot like projection of one's "laziness" (mentally it's much more complex than that) onto a doctor, even though that doctor has probably seen hundreds of cases with the same predictable outcomes and knows that appropriate weight management would head off more serious treatment.

Frankly, I think doctors are anything but lazy when they are "forced" to order and perform risky and invasive treatments on a patient who refused to meet them halfway before the treatment became necessary in the first place. I get it, nobody likes being told what to do, especially when it seems (and literally is) so personal. But doctors also don't like to be told what to do ("fix me!") when a patient deigns even the gentlest suggestion to take some control of their issues at hand.

I am now 30lbs below my highest weight. The severity of my issues (joint pain, lethargy, depression, etc.) has palpably lessened losing that 30lbs very inconsistently over the last four years. If anything, I think doctors need to better read the psychological resistance many people have with weight loss and then illustrate to, rather than tell, patients how to attain weight loss in ways that don't seem restrictive.

That 30lbs of mine, could I have done that in 30 weeks or fewer? Sure, but I didn't want to feel perpetually hungry. In fact, I never even set a goal weight. Instead of thinking "Idgaf about my weight" or "I must lose 20lbs by Christmas!!" I just made the tiniest changes, the biggest one being taking advantage of times I wasn't hungry by (gasp) not eating.

... Shit, I guess lazy weight loss works, too!

[–] Guy_Fieris_Hair 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I guess I work in the medical field and I know a lot of doctors are overwhelmed and are really only looking for the quickest way to get you back out the door. They aren't "lazy" ... I guess, just overworked. But also lazy. I live in a rural town, good doctors don't come here.

[–] yamanii 2 points 3 months ago

I mean, they really are, it also happened to me, I'm not that big, I weight 115kg, almost fell down a hole on the sidewalk but my foot twisted high and I was able to keep my balance.

Now my foot was hurting real bad for days, went to a doctor and he said that I should lose weight to fix it, even though I told him what happened, so I just went to another one that actually gave me a solution via physiotherapy and now I'm good.