this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2023
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Assume that the future can change based on your actions, so any historical information that you bring along with you from the intervening 25 years may quickly drift out of the new realities history.

Edit: also assume that you can be given a healthy 21-year-old body if you want or take your previous self's place.

Further, identification will be provided for you if you were not born at that time.

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[–] Delphia 117 points 11 months ago (9 children)

Simple. Im ripping up the ticket.

Since my actions have knock on effects and the ticket is 1 way that means Id have to abandon my wife and child and given how much my actions would change things, effectively unmake my daughter.

The worlds fucked, I might be able to unfuck it but theres a better chance Id just create a different flavor of shit sandwich. But to know Id never hear "Dayyydeee come pway wif meeeeee" again.

Fuck it. Let it burn.

[–] Protoknuckles 17 points 11 months ago

If you got a camping backpack maybe you could bring them! That's my plan.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

What would your response be if you could take your family with you?

[–] Delphia 12 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (9 children)

Id need seed money so Id get the lottery numbers for the biggest win shortly after I arrive, digital copies of the worlds financial newspapers for 25 years, some targeted stock info on companies like Google, Amazon, Apple, Intel, facebook and other "Big Tech" and media firms. Knowing when to buy certain stocks and when to dump them would allow me to slow grow myself into someone that could have serious levels of control over a vast number of industries with far reach.

To make an impact with that reach, Id also have a serious SHITLOAD of research papers for anything related to green energy, cancer research and any other medical research that could save a shitload of lives. With 25 years of "leaps and bounds" in tech and medicine up my sleeve Id start a green energy company that knows which competition to buy and when, what "suggestions" to offer my researchers when I stop by for a visit. Same with biotech and medical research.

Given 25 years Id be a global renewable energy mogul who has done more to cure cancer (especially in kids) aids and a host of other diseases than any other man in history, controlling significant portions of the mass media in every first world country I could get my hooks into AND with the ear of very serious people in academic circles... Id be a fucking kingmaker with such an amazing public persona that to come at me would be career suicide for anyone in politics.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Uh, no one said save the world. The assignment was to take it over.

[–] Delphia 8 points 11 months ago

Dont want to do that either if it means abandoning my daughter. If I was going to do it I'm doing it benevolently.

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[–] ilovetacos 75 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Just hope your school bully doesn't find it.

[–] ShittyBeatlesFCPres 19 points 11 months ago (1 children)

God forbid we end up on the 1985 timeline. Can you imagine if someone like Biff became rich and powerful?

[–] Brickhead92 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Looks at every billionaire... Yeah imagine that.

[–] grue 9 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

The joke is that alternate-1985 Biff was literally based on Trump, specifically.

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[–] [email protected] 59 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (6 children)

I come with scientific evidence of the impeding doom that will be brought by climate change and urge the world's powers to reduce greenhouse gas emissions while there is still time! Surely everybody will listen to my proofs and act to protect the world!

[–] [email protected] 36 points 11 months ago (1 children)
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[–] mutant_zz 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

We already had that evidence by the 1960s!

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[–] captainlezbian 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Honestly it might be better to bring proof gore is better than bush or they he won florida

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[–] CIA_chatbot 54 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (9 children)

Lottery numbers and a historical record of the stock market: first, win lottery then invest based on performance

Become a billionaire, then join the oligarchy and use my stock knowledge to bankrupt the rest of the oligarchy

[–] [email protected] 39 points 11 months ago (3 children)

At some point, wouldn't having future knowledge of the stock market either lead to you changing the stock market with the presence of your money until your predictions lose their accuracy, or else get you investigated for insider trading due to it being statistically insanely unlikely to be that lucky?

[–] grabyourmotherskeys 10 points 11 months ago (7 children)

You could just spread it across a bunch of GICs and then ETFs that were solid performers. You have your lottery money, you just need to earn enough to live the way you want. With enough invested but diversified you could make a fortune without influencing anything as a result of personal choices.

If anythjng, the initial lottery win will have the biggest impact on the timeline, assuming you lay low afterward.

Now, here's the thing. I'd say you would be sharing those winnings with the original winner unless you prevented them from getting the ticket so find a jackpot twice as big as you need and hope a bunch of yous from alternate timeline don't get the same idea.

That's what would happen to me and I'd end up winning about $3.50.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You could also find some of the lottery winners that absolutely hated what happened to their lives after they won and win the draw right before their ticket would have won.

That way you spare them the misery that the money brought them and you get a nice chunk of change for yourself in the process.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

... It freaks me out that is exactly my plan that I've spitballed in the shower several times.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

Cia_chatbot knows.

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[–] hightrix 32 points 11 months ago (4 children)

All of Wikipedia on a thumb drive

List of winning power ball numbers for the past 2 decades.

$20 cash to buy bitcoin

That’s enough. More than enough money to never work again and info to help stop 9/11, etc…

[–] grue 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)

$20 cash to buy bitcoin

Bring a 2023 model computer back with you and you could just mine all the bitcoin yourself.

Hell, you could even temporally-plagiarize Satoshi Nakamoto and invent it yourself.

[–] hightrix 20 points 11 months ago (6 children)

This is a great idea but it requires effort and if I were to mine 10billion bitcoin very early, that may change the future of bitcoin such that it never hits 30k+ value per. It seems safer to simply buy 1000 of them at a $0.10 to resale at 10k+.

My plan is minimal effort, minimal impact to anyone that isn’t me, and to get all the money I could ever need.

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[–] IIII 7 points 11 months ago

Your smartphone probably has a comparable amount of processing power to some of the earlier mining farms. May as well just mine the bitcoin

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago (3 children)

A healthy 21 body and 1999? Fuck taking over the world, and I don't need your stinking backpack, just tell me where to get that ticket and where to show up, I'm not going to miss this! I'm taking a cyanide pill though when 2020 rolls around; I'm not doing this shit again.

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[–] LemmyKnowsBest 22 points 11 months ago

I would have no inclination to take over the world. But if I could go back to that date, I would make a million different decisions over the next few years to steer my life in a much wiser direction.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago

Grays Sports Almanac

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago (5 children)

Get every flagship CPU and GPU from 2000 to today that I can get my hands on. Also as much open source code as I can get hold of. And especially AI stuff - there's several fully open source models, so bring those, and as much technical writings on them as possible.

Speaking of which, download every science paper published since 2000 that I can get hold of, in every possible field.

Get as much info on the 2000 election as possible, to hand to Al Gore, see if he can win that election with a solid unassailable margin.

Research stocks, lottery, and everything else I can to get fast money within the shortest possible period of time after I get there, so I can get super rich before the butterfly effect makes predictions impossible, I need billions in seed money and I need it fast.

Then use that money to start a private research group, and hand them all the scientific papers I brought. Get those experts to work studying all this knowledge and figure out what can be turned into practical technology. Turn some of this into profit-making devices to fund continued development, but release as much as possible for free.

Essentially, deluge the world in as much new technology as possible, mostly free and open source, holding back only as much as necessary in order to fund continued research.

And oh jeez the pharmaceutical industry. Release for free every drug made since 2000, so the pharmaceutical industry can't get their patents in them.

Big list of stuff there, but if I pulled off even half of it, the world would probably be a much better place in 25 years than in my original timeline.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

An entire offline copy of Wikipedia up to Jan 1 2024 on a tablet. Having all the world events up to that date available to consult at my fingertips, I could use it in so many ways.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Don't forget a charger, otherwise you'll be screwed for awhile

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[–] captnanonymous 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The bag is full of post-1999 MTG cards that I will trade for pre-1999 MTG cards.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

Greys. Sports. Almanac.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Probably a backpack full of smart phones, go sell them and retire.

Then cry that it'll be a long time until I can use USB C again.

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[–] Clbull 12 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I would bring Wednesday 6th January 1999's winning lottery numbers, five books chronicling the last 25 years of British history, history of businesses, history of the tech industry between 1998 and 2023, modern military history, and the history of Blackrock. Also I would choose a healthy 21-year-old body.

The plan is... win the lottery for some immediate starting capital, make well-informed investments, effectively become the Warren Buffet of Britain and weasel my way into the world elite, befriending figures like David Cameron, Tony Blair, Jeffrey Epstein, Bill Clinton, etc. I would make timely investments into new startups like Facebook, Twitter, etc, jump on the Bitcoin, Dogecoin and Ethereum bandwagons early and make it my aim to become the richest man in the world. With that wealth I'd then buy more shares in Blackrock, Blackwater and Lockheed Martin, seemingly be at the top of my game as head of a PMC. I would assist in conflicts that maintain the status quo as best as I could.

I would also do a tonne of work with African military forces, make loads of private investments in African firms and , and beat China to the punch.

With the exception of Blackwater, I would not aim to be a majority shareholder in any of these companies. I'd keep maybe... 5 to 10 percent of shares in the really successful companies, lose a bit of money in falls to not arouse too much suspicion, but I would otherwise climb to the top of the PMC ladder and put my fingers in as many NATO pies as possible.

That's what I'd do if my aim as a time traveller was to take over the world. In actuality, I'd rather just win the lottery, diversify my investments and retire comfortably. I don't desire world domination.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Bitcoin has outperformed stocks by about 100,000-fold. All you need is a fiver to invest at the beginning.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

A current download of Wikipedia.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago

I've got no motivation to take over the world, nor am I sure it's really possible in a life time. I don't really have a non-boring answer to this hypothetical.

If the ticket is available anyway I'd happily take it, I'm single at the moment with no dependents and being younger and healthier would be huge. There are lots of ways to make money with the knowledge of future history, even if it'll change when you start impacting it, and any one of them could make me wealthy enough to never have to work again in my life and do so wherever I please.

I've never really understood the need of the rich to continually amass wealth or how they spend it.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

All the FLOSS software i could put my hands on (with source code), a couple awesome smartphones, wikipedia dump, sports almanac, and a stable-diffusion rig.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Invent Apple Google and Amazon all at once. Yes, I know they all existed at that time but I would just do their best ideas before them.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

New Pied Piper

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

A Lenovo P series with deepfacelab. I would work public perception of Dubya (and Jeb) to avoid the decades of war crimes.

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