this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2023
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As strange as it may seem, I hate my accent and want to speak like an American because I think it sounds cooler and more like how I want to sound.

I've more or less perfected my version of an American accent on my own, I think.

But whenever I'm with other people who know me, I revert back to my old accent instinctively because that's how they know me to sound like. I'm unsure about how I can subtly transition without them noticing a sudden change, such as through gradual exposure to my accent changing more each time they hear it. That way I could argue that I don't know how it happened and it was a slow progression if they eventually realise it's different, rather than something forced that I started doing one day.

The biggest thing I think is changing the pronunciation of certain words with "a", such as going from "fahst" to "faast" for the word 'fast', or "mahsk" to "maask" for 'mask'. Because it's really one or the other, there's no in-between. I feel like for most other sounds, a gradual transition into more American sounds can be possible, but that one's like, how can I make the plunge and will people notice it straight away and think it's weird?

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[–] Fecundpossum 105 points 11 months ago (8 children)

My sibling in Christ, just relax and be yourself. You’ll pick up the accent more and more over time, that’s how it works. Forcing it is disingenuous. Imagine if my goofy midwestern ass moved to the UK and started to try to speak with Brits forcing their accent.

[–] yenahmik 42 points 11 months ago

This reminded me of my first year at uni when a guy decided to speak in a fake British accent, I guess to sound cooler. Unfortunately for him, we could all tell it was fake and that made him decidedly uncool (and the butt of a lot of jokes). I think he gave it up after a couple of weeks.

The fact is, the coolest thing you can do is be confident in yourself (including how you sound when speaking naturally).

[–] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Mate, I don’t think he’s even moved.

So this is like if you started talking in a British accent in your midwestern location.

How truly fucking bizarre OP is.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

OP sounds young. Kids are weird, but this is harmless and they’re clearly embarrassed about it.

[–] Fecundpossum 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I think they just wanna fit in, which is a totally relatable feeling. But I promise, this is not the way you want to fit in.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

No, it’s not how to fit in. I don’t think calling them bizarre is going to help the situation though. They’re not bizarre, they’re just looking for approval the wrong way.

I think it’s probably more to stand out in a cool way, but it’s still not going to happen like this. The problem with “cool” is that it’s nebulous and there’s no formula for it. I would not be able to be cool while obviously faking an accent, but someone who’s really cool might still be able to pull it off. Hell, I have a genuine American accent in another country (a pretty light one) and I can’t embrace it enough for it to be cool.

What’s really hard to learn is that OP’s not going to be cool until OP is cool with themselves, and that’s difficult to do when surrounded by people who don’t think you’re cool. That’s why most people get cooler when they leave high school, and that’s also why people tend to get nicer.

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[–] EditsHisComments 16 points 11 months ago

I had some friends in Munich who were brothers, just two or three years apart. They both grew up learning British English, but one eventually participated in an exchange program in Canada while the other participated in one in Australia. When they came back, their English accents were completely different from each other - no matter how hard they tried to sound similar to each other. In the end, everyone though it was unique and kind of fun since one brother would sometimes use slang the other didn't understand.

Point being, OP, is to do what feels natural. Ultimately, it's your voice, but you'll pick up certain things here and there that naturally change your way of speaking over time.

[–] guy_threepwood 3 points 11 months ago

Not forcing things is generally pretty good life advice. It’s like a fart: if you have to force it it’s probably shit.

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[–] half_built_pyramids 60 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Pretend to fall and hit your head some night out with friends. Not enough for them to force you to stay up and get a cat scan, but just enough. Just enough to leave some doubt. Then start talking American the next day

[–] Mr_Blott 35 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Good idea, that way, if your mates try to get you to go for the scan, you can baffle them by announcing that you "Can't afford it" 😂

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[–] LordOfTheChia 18 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Even better, find someone who talks in an American accent who wants to speak in your old accent.

Agree to bump into each other hard in front of your friends, when you get up, switch accents.

Alternative, celebrate your birthday together and each can wish for the others accent.

[–] ethman42 8 points 11 months ago

This is the way. Keep us updated OP

[–] [email protected] 25 points 11 months ago

Life is too short, just do it and when people notice say you're trying it out for fun for a bit.

This is probably something you'll think was really silly in a few years but who cares, live a little.

[–] BeatTakeshi 25 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Your approach is defeating your purpose. Muricans would be loud and outspoken so everyone around knows

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago

There is not a slow enough change for that to unnoticed. People will notice.

Also ... just why? Why American? There are so many nice accents to choose.

[–] hmancuso 20 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I won't go into the reasons why you're doing that. Instead, I'll just focus on your plans, because I don't think a gradual change of accent will go unnoticed. Just do it. Embrace the American accent you love so much and live it to the fullest. And if anyone asks you what happened, just say you're tired of your own accent and are trying something new. Explain it clearly to others and own up to it. This will make you feel good because you're being honest by telling others why you have decided to change.

However, you should bear in mind that a language is much more than just an accent. It also includes people's choice of words and idioms and expresses the way they see the world. It would be strange if I decided to speak Brazilian Portuguese with a Portuguese accent (from Portugal). Those who know me would be confused because this "Portuguese character" in me speaks the local language perfectly with the wrong accent. How come?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Disconnect yourself from absolutely everyone you know and everywhere you usually go; take a long vacation somewhere relatively close but isolated enough from where you live.

Then, pretend this is actually a trip to America. You can fake photos online, AI makes this very easy for you today. Return to your normal life and carry on with the American accent. Continue taking fake (or if you can, real) holidays to America to justify the accent.

[–] sir_pronoun 10 points 11 months ago

Bonus points if you move to the sewers of your home town and cast your fist menacingly towards the voices coming from above, muttering "I will show you all..!" in a very flawed American accent

[–] Rhynoplaz 18 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

When I was a kid, I had a friend who was trying to do different accents, and he wasn't joking when he said "it's not fair that I have to practice all these different accents, but if anyone wanted to copy mine, all they have to do is just talk normal."

He honestly thought that EVERYONE had a Northwest PA accent by default and that everyone else just chooses to talk in an accent.

So, I guess, just talk normal. 🤷🏻‍♂️😂

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago

Singing lessons. I'm honestly not even kidding.

I'm an American who grew up in a part of the country called Appalachia. My native accent is often associated with being uneducated and stupid, so I learned how to change it when I was a young adult.

The thing that helped me most was voice lessons that taught me how to control the muscles in the nasopharynx, throat, tongue. The reason that's difficult is because you can't see the way those muscles move when someone else speaks or sings, so you can't just mimic what they're doing. It takes a little bit more effort to learn.

Learning how to sing classical western music (opera type stuff) allowed me to learn how to speak in that kind of just generic Midwestern American accent that has less negative social associations.

Now, that being said, I also have Indian friends who grew up in the United States who still speak with a similar Indian accent as their immigrant parents, and it's really no big deal. So you could just roll with your native accent.

(And also, I still code switch back into my native accent when I'm talking to my family or I visit my home region. Your native accent never goes away even when you learn a different way of speaking.)

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago

You are never going to be able to do it so gradually that no one notices. There will always come a point at which they think "weird, @PlogLod sort of sounds American".

For that reason I think you may as well just fully commit straight away and get it over with.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (2 children)

As an American myself, I encourage you to keep your natural accent. We're a nation of immigrants built from people who originated all over the world. So there's not just one recognizable accent here. Nobody's accent is superior to others. I've known people from other countries who are self conscious about their accents. In response, I tell them honestly that I appreciate the way they sound. Variety is the spice of life, as the saying goes.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

OP doesn't actually live in the US themselves, they just want to sound like an American.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Aza 'Merican maseff,… um, maybe try for mid-Atlantic.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Don't ease into it at all. Wait for a moment where it would be funny, then go whole hog with it. Treat it like a joke... but then just keep going. Never go back. Don't even acknowledge there is a back. Pretend this is how you've always talked and they're insane if they think otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

Yes. This is the answer. Gaslighting.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago

We sound stupid though...

[–] Fondots 14 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

So first of all, which American accent? There's no single accent.

Secondly, if you try to transition slowly, odds are you're going to get made fun of a whole lot along the way for nearly every single American pronunciation you make, because each individual change will stick out more in context. so we're talking about months or years of people thinking you're weird, stupid, or have some kind of speech impediment instead of getting it all out of the way in one go. I have a fairly strong Philadelphian accent, and even here in my home turf I've had the odd person try to make fun of my pronunciation of things like "water" (wooder,) generally it's pretty good-natured fun, but once in a while you get some asshole with a stick up their ass about proper pronunciation. You're setting yourself up for a long time of that, and it will only get worse up until you're actually able to pass as an American.

Third, don't try to be cool, it never works. The coolest thing out there really is just having the right amount of confidence. Trying to change your accent because it sounds cooler kind reeks of trying too hard, like weebs sprinkling way too much Japanese into their conversations for no good reason, or people using big words to sound smarter, or whatever the fuck Elizabeth Holmes does with her voice. It's basically the verbal of equivalent of a neckbeard wearing a fedora (is that still a thing or am I dating myself?)

If you're actually dead-set on changing your accent, the best way is to just live in America and immerse yourself in it and come into it naturally, and you'll pick it up, and then it gives you a solid reason to say how/why you picked it up. You're going to need to spend some significant time here though, months at a minimum, probably years, otherwise at best people will just think you're an obnoxious, maybe naive weirdo who's huffing their own farts about how well-traveled they are, or at worse think you're some sort of weeaboo type obsessive nutjob about America (Google "Rawhide Kobayashi" and you'd get a pretty good sense of how people might think of you)

Last thoughts on the matter, if there's American slang you like, go ahead and use it, but do it naturally, don't force it. I sprinkle all kinds of weird shit into my speech that I've picked up from all over the place, things I've read, heard others say, movies, tv, the internet, but it's never been a conscious choice, it just happens naturally, trying to force it never makes it feel natural. "Stop trying to make fetch happen."

[–] Jakdracula 3 points 11 months ago

Now explain “jawn” to him.

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[–] Chickenstalker 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Step 2: If anyone looks at you funny while speaking, just pull your gun out, aim it at the ceiling and go "Yeehaw!" Fire a half a dozen shots, and do a little jig before reholstering your gun

I can almost guarantee know one will press you further about the speech issue.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

By "American accent", do you mean the style of speaking that's commonly used in American movies and TV? Because that's an intentional neutral/ambiguous accent, based primarily on the styles used in the Midwest.

It doesn't actually match any region, and it certainly doesn't match all regions of the US. The accents in New York, California, Texas, and the Deep South all have stark contrasts to this, and to each other.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Although, thanks to that somewhat bland accent being so prevalent on TV and in movies, regional accents are shifting to sort of match it. Especially in younger generations.

[–] RagingSnarkasm 9 points 11 months ago

When you see them next, immediately greet them in a heavy Brooklyn accent. When they ask you what that's all about, apologize profuse in a thick Nawleans cajun accent. When this is met with blank stares from your friends, immediately rush into another apology, this time with your best MinneSEWta flavor. After they finally come out of their stunned silence, revert to a generic American accent. They'll never notice.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

What country are you from and what's your original accent?

[–] arbitrary_sarcasm 6 points 11 months ago

You don't really say why you don't want your close ones to realize that you're picking up an American accent. Maybe it's just fear about being ridiculed?

If you're looking for justification for changing your accent, there's definitely arguments that can support you. But the important thing is for you to understand that you can do whatever makes you happy. And if your friends are any good, they'll understand that.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Don't make the same mistake that Ross from Friends did!

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BmTUOuXPlnA&t=55s

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

I agree with the general sentiment here that please don't, but, if you must, I think it would be cool to practice in secret until you get really, really fucking good at it, then just switch over all at once. Preferably with a large audience. Just be giving a presentation at work and go from Liverpool to Indianapolis, mid-sentence.

[–] krashmo 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

They might notice, but does it really matter if they do? It's nice of you to think of how your actions impact other people but in this case it seems like you're focusing too much on that aspect of it. If you want to speak with an American accent then you should do it.

I really don't think anyone will make more than a passing comment about it. You can say "I'm working on speaking more clearly" or something like that. If people don't accept that answer then that is their problem to deal with.

[–] PlogLod 2 points 11 months ago (6 children)

I have a friend who moved to America for a short time then when they returned, they had an American accent. But people didn't believe it and mocked them saying "that's not your real accent". I'm kind of worried the same will happen for me..

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

What's a "real" accent? Plenty of people have multiple accents that they code-switch between depending on who they're talking to.

An Englishman from Newcastle might talk to his childhood friends in Geordie, talk to his colleagues in RP, and meet some family from Leeds and talk to them in a Yorkshire accent.

Accents aren't this big static monolith.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

I think you should just own it. Say, "hey folks, I got a new voice! Deal!"

If they try to mock you, turn it around in them. "Damn, you're really hung up on this huh? That's a shame, you should really work on that."

My last name is Gross, and people sometimes ask me if I got teased growing up. And the answer is no. There's not much you can do with my name. There's nothing to embarrass me with. You wanna call me gross? Go ahead. That's my name. What now?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Just reply "Nah but it's fun"

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[–] TheHotze 3 points 11 months ago

Two options, just tell them that you want to practice your American accent, or use it when you quote your friends. The second one works best if it's close friends who enjoy making fun of each other a bit.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Maybe mention that you're 'taking lessons' to change/Americanize your accent to the people you're familiar with and then fairly rapidly incorporate your new dialect into your speech? This kinda changes something you may be embarrassed about into something more akin to learning a new language. I'm sure after a short bit, your new speech will just become normal sounding, and everyone will forget about the change.

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