this post was submitted on 24 Nov 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost

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all 29 comments
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[–] [email protected] 94 points 11 months ago (3 children)

That’s actually a genius prank. Now I just need to find a spaceship…

[–] [email protected] 45 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Spaceship is easy. I need to find a child. And an attic.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest 12 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Hey. This post is about fun things for a person to do with their own newborn baby.

You don't just go out and "find a child."

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Excuse you, but that's how Superman was found. Haven't you seen the documentaries?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Well the kid would need a friend. By any chance can someone convince a family of a billionaire preferably with only one kid and have a massive cave just under their mansion to walk down in a dark alleyway?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Speak for yourself, I always misplace newborn babies.

[–] FlyingSquid 4 points 11 months ago

This is why you put AirTags on them.

[–] Aux 4 points 11 months ago

Of course you do! Just visit your local labour ward, plenty of free babies to choose from!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

Yeah, I know it's not that easy. Usually it's a difficult process.

[–] soylentgreed 35 points 11 months ago (2 children)

A bit of junkyard scrap, leds, and some luminescent goo would get the point across. Make sure to use your shittiest camera too.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You lost me at "luminescent goo."

[–] soylentgreed 4 points 11 months ago

Like the liquid in a glowstick. Or whatever Hollywood uses when they portray plutonium.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

And a space blanket. Because that makes good sense.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Just pull off some photoshop skills

[–] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago (2 children)

if youre not rich and/or use linux, use gimp instead

[–] FlyingSquid 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Ahoy, matey! You don't have to be rich!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

i had thought it cost 50+ usd to use photoshop lol, now that i checked its 21usd, which i'd say is still a lot compared to nothing, but you dont have to be rich

though for me and anyone else who lives in brazil, 21usd costs 103real, though youd think minimum wage would be higher to account for that, right? WRONG, its lower. so anyway, you have to be rich to use photoshop in brazil, and for some reason i thought the price for it was a lot higher

[–] FlyingSquid 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

That's not what I was suggesting, landlubber.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

i know, i was just saying why i had thought anyone who used photoshop had a lot of money

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

These days it's barely even skills. Just select a box above the baby and use the generative AI feature to ask it for a spaceship and regenerate until it looks decent.

Back in my day we had to generate our realistic Photoshop jobs with our own blood, sweat, and tears.

[–] Fades 29 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Is a 10 yo really gonna take that as evidence he’s fuckin Clark Kent?

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago

Tell them they're adopted first

[–] FlyingSquid 7 points 11 months ago

This is a very serious shitpost and you are asking the right questions.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

Kid is gonna think he's goku

[–] jacktherippah 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Have actors record a video for the kid. Make the video start with "Kal El, my son."

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Then call the kid an idiot for thinking he's an alien. Ultimate gaslighting!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

This is what aliens would like you to believe