this post was submitted on 11 Sep 2023
976 points (97.5% liked)

Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 115 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago

Ubuntu really makes it hard to keep liking it. They keep pushing bullshit like snap.

[–] [email protected] 88 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] marcos 41 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I don't know about vim, but emacs does have a clippy package for real. You can even make it be useful if you try hard enough.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

That almost makes me wanna switch but I enjoy fish too much....even if it's probably got issues above my level of use bc idk what I'm doing most of the time 😆

[–] [email protected] 74 points 10 months ago (1 children)
$ rm -rf /
Removing /etc/passwords...
~ WITH XXXXX ANTIVIR, PROTECT YOUR PASSWORDS FOR ONLY 5.99$ PER MONTH ~
Removing /home/user...
~ WITH XXX VPN, ACCESS ALL YOUR CONTENT ONLINE FROM ANY COUNTRY IN THE WORLD, 19.99$ PER YEAR FOR NEW SUBSCRIPTIONS ~
Removing /bin/bash...
~ DO YOU WANT A BIGGER D ? TAKE XXXX PILLS, 99.9% SUCCESS ~
...
[–] topinambour_rex 43 points 10 months ago (2 children)

You forgot the Your command will be executed in 10...9...8...

After each ads.

[–] MeatsOfRage 17 points 10 months ago

Y'all just need to get Terminal Pro for $16.99 a month for that sweet ad free experience

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

I have sl installed

[–] breadsmasher 51 points 10 months ago

Already have ads with node / npm “looking for developers / donations / funding” messages

[–] [email protected] 38 points 10 months ago (3 children)

The lion, the witch and the gall on this bitch...

Leave terminal alone.

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 10 months ago (4 children)
~ $ adware
(...ncurses ad featuring blockchain shows for 10 seconds...)

Sorry, internet connection is required to run adware.
Aborted
~ $ 

(plugs in ethernet cable)

~ $ adware
(...ncurses ad featuring Threads displays for 10 seconds...)
(...ncurses ad featuring next-gen Android displays for 10 seconds...)
Press CTRL+C to skip the ad
[^C[^C
Got tired from ads? Buy Adware Pro for $5.99/mo [Y/n] n

ADWARE SHELL
(C) 2023 Buy-n-Large Corp. All wrongs reserved
---ad---
How much do YOU think this advanced operating environment is worth?
Just press F1 to get the answer!
---ad---

Activate Adware
Go to Settings to Activate Adware
% exit
Please watch all the ads to be able to exit.
(...ncurses ad featuring alt medicine displays for 30 seconds...)
(...ncurses ad featuring ad-blocker for 30 seconds...)
[^C
Interrupt rejected. Please watch all the ads.
[^C[^C[^D[^X[^Z[^Z[^Z (unplugs ethernet cable)
Interrupt rejected. Please watch all the ads. Buy Adware Pro for $5.99 to allow interrupts.

The last step I leave to you.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago

Your local account has not been verified yet:
please enter your user ID, your SSN, your credit card number, your home address, your credit card's PIN, the SHA512 hash of your bank account's password (salted with 0x71a0 at the beginning) and the number of bytes received by your work computer's primary network interface with a maximum error of 256kb to allow interrupts.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago

Please drink verification can to continue

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I mean... I already use ubuntu, so...

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 31 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 29 points 10 months ago (5 children)

Doesn't npm have this already? I've definitely gotten requests for donations and various political messages when installing dependencies.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

That's probably cause you or your packages use CoreJS. It's basically a one man project that's holding up the whole modern Internet infrastructure. You can look up the story online, but it was a pretty small donation request for a really relatable individual.

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[–] bi_tux 28 points 10 months ago

People who know how to use a terminal know how to block ads

[–] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago

This is the beuty of FOSS. I can add them myself, whenever I want to.

[–] Touching_Grass 21 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

In my free time I develop ways for advertisers to reach as many platforms as possible. I hate ads as much as I hate people who say things like "just skip it if you don't like them" so I spend my time trying to fill every inch of their lives with ads as possible.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

I can get behind this flavour of evil. Keep doing satan's work, lad!

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 10 months ago

You better delete this, fuck you!

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

cowsay "Like, subscribe and ringadingding that bell for more!"

[–] Asudox 14 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)
________________________________________
/ Like, subscribe and ringadingding that \
\ bell for more!                         /
 ----------------------------------------
        \   ^__^
         \  (oo)\_______
            (__)\       )\/\
                ||----w |
                ||     ||
[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Time for me to learn how to build a Lemmy bot, it seems

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[–] Eonandahalf 16 points 10 months ago

OMFG!! Don’t give them ideas!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago

No. Just no.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Next level: just type what you want and let the AI figure it out. 1 ad per prompt

[–] superduperenigma 18 points 10 months ago

Me: ChatGPT, please find and install the necessary packages for Thunderbird

ChatGPT: Say no more, fam. sudo rm -rf/*

[–] ilovegodette 7 points 10 months ago

KILL SELF

SUDO !!

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