this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2024
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[–] Stern 32 points 3 days ago

He was also a refugee, whipped bankers, fed the poor, gave free healthcare, and advocated paying your taxes.

[–] rayquetzalcoatl 18 points 4 days ago (1 children)

He might have survived crucifixion if he'd had the tetanus vaccine...?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, don't you know vaccines can prevent positional asphyxiation?

[–] FlyingSquid 5 points 3 days ago (2 children)
[–] this_1_is_mine 5 points 3 days ago

If you take too long to die they would break your legs which obviously makes it harder to breathe when .... Held in the crucifixion pose you have to hold your self up with your feet to relive the tension on your chest so you can breathe in. Break you legs and you can't stand Anymore on top of your feet being nailed hands having been whipped till ground beef... Being forced to drag your tool of destruction.....

The spear was post mortem to confirm the death. Kinda hard to straight face fake dead while getting stabbed and not flinching. Maybe even a giggle.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure scripture dictates that the spear happened after he already died.

[–] VindictiveJudge 1 points 1 day ago

But imagine if he was just passed out and his last words were, "Ow, fuck!" after his dignified intended last words. Just like Roald Dahl.

[–] Vorticity 17 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I don't take issue with all of this post, but I do take issue with some of it:

  • Vaccines - Agreed, good
  • Home birthed - Agreed, not a home
  • Breastfed - Breastfeeding has been shown to actually be better than formula because its nutrients are more readily absorbed by the babies. It if generally for brain development, the immune system, and overall physical development.
  • Essential oils - Agreed, junk science, but they do smell nice!
  • Tetanus vaccine - Bullshit. He was hung out to become jerky in the middle-eastern sun. His death had nothing to do with tetanus.

Lastly, the arguments being made against the insane post are unnecessary. All you need to ask is "would you like your kid to grow up in the same environment that Jesus grew up in?" Anyone being honest would have to say "no" unless they are insane.

[–] mwproductions 10 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Yeah, who the fuck is anti-breastfeeding?

[–] then_three_more 13 points 4 days ago
[–] shalafi 4 points 3 days ago

Apparently a lot of people in my area. Every time we got any prenatal care we were lectured about vaccines and breast feeding.

Finally got sick of repeating that we were going to breastfeed and get shots.

"Hit her (the baby) with whatever you got at whatever appropriate schedule."

Nurses mouth dropped.

"We're not stupid."

"ok... good"

[–] FlyingSquid 4 points 3 days ago

I am not anti-breastfeeding, but my daughter just was not willing to do it for more than a few seconds and she was willing to take a bottle. My wife pumped breast milk for a while, but it's a tedious and humiliating thing to do, so after a couple of months, we switched to formula.

Sometimes breastfeeding just isn't possible, unfortunately.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago
[–] WhereGrapesMayRule 20 points 4 days ago (1 children)

He was also commanded to submit himself to death by his mother's rapist.

[–] FourPacketsOfPeanuts 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] WhereGrapesMayRule 1 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Maybe, but was too young to consent

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

might have survived

The Jesus they stabbed and crucified was kinda fucked either way. No shot in the ass will fix a gaping abdominal hemorrhage. I think how callous they were is why Jesus/iacov first bailed out of the cult - fuck this - but reconsidered 3 days later -- how scientological. If this was after the battle of mageddon then it woulda been a war crimes / retribution thing anyway. Wasn't Jesus/iago the Christ and a badass? If he was the elder brother and the heir to both families' fortune then maybe.

But you know iacov, he wasn't the same, which is likely why he took his wife and 0-3 kids and super fucked off. Did he abdicate? Who knows; there's no motivation for the church to resolve the three Marys, let alone the two Jesuses, so that detail would have been edited out if it did exist.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Tbf legendary Jesus probably never existed, at least as a single individual. But the teachings are well-ahead of his times, and sadly, apparently, well-ahead of ours.

I wish I could have a conversation with Vonnegut, though, over whiskey and cigars, about Cat's Cradle.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I love the teachings of Christ. But I don't have illusions about it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago

No need to have illusions over any religion, because illusions lead to delusions. I refer to what I was indoctrinated into more often than other religions because that's what I'm most familiar with; but I tend to take what I want and discard what I don't, from all of them.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

But the teachings are well-ahead of his times

Not really, most of it is copy-pasted from either contemporaries (abandon your family and follow me), or from much older sources (treat others how you want to be treated).

[–] FourPacketsOfPeanuts 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Jesus himself said that none of his teaching was new, he taught the Torah to Jews, even "love your enemy" is an application of Leviticus 19:18

He gave one "new" command: love one another in the way I've shown you. (John 13:34)

The golden rule was not unique to Christianity, but the founder illustrating that love ought to be self-sacrificing and leading by example was new.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

I didn't answer that person because it seems so obvious, by looking around us and at ourselves that if we haven't mastered the lesson, it's certainly ahead of our time.

"Abandoned family...” not like he was married, and left a wife and child destitute. Neither did Siddhartha, his spouse and child remained in luxury afaict but who knows?

[–] FlyingSquid 5 points 3 days ago

I'm guessing Jesus would have had a lot more friends his age if there were modern medicine back then...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 days ago

He was also an "illegal" immigrant.

[–] ChicoSuave 5 points 4 days ago

If we're just saying things without context, sure. He was a violent anticapitalist, radical socialist who fed anyone who asked for free, dying in his early thirties after loving a sex worker. Your move Karen.

[–] Hiro8811 2 points 4 days ago

Just like the rest of the popular of that time? Neat

[–] [email protected] -4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Jesus didn't exist, it's a made up story. So no matter what you say about 'him', it's all untrue. Fiction is fiction. Grow up already. Imaginary friends are for small children and the mentally ill.

[–] FourPacketsOfPeanuts 2 points 3 days ago

the supernatural, obviously, is made up, but the most current secular historians centre around Jesus and his core teaching being based in fact. not least because there are a good deal of his teaching that are inconvenient and which no-one trying to create a religion would have invented out of thin air.

see: pretty much anything written by Bart Ehrman

even Carrier, the "golden boy" of the myth point of view, says he calculates a 2/3rds probability that Jesus was not a myth.