this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2024
718 points (98.6% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 138 points 2 weeks ago

Now this, this, is what I can call wholesome.

[–] [email protected] 113 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Imagine not having a clown fetish...

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Waddaya have that’s a little easier?

[–] Gradually_Adjusting 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Imagine not having a mime fetish

[–] [email protected] 35 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I blame derpixion for my mime fetish

[–] Gradually_Adjusting 16 points 2 weeks ago

Don't worry about it. If the whole thing would still be hot without the novelty, that ain't a fetish it's just window dressing.

I'm just amazed someone got the reference. 🤡

[–] Deadeyegai 84 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
  • Fake: anon has gf, much less a clown gf (cringeness adds believability though)
  • Gay: Anon def got came on
[–] [email protected] 70 points 2 weeks ago

Not on, he got creampied.

[–] [email protected] 82 points 2 weeks ago

If anon doesn't put a ring on her then I will

[–] [email protected] 62 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

Ah yes, everybody has that one drawer to keep pies in.

[–] Skullgrid 72 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

nothing ever happens.

surely the woman that got dressed up made up etc before the dude comes over could put a pie in a drawer

[–] Batman 28 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I think the pies they use to smack your face are usually just whip cream too

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Whip cream on a flexible paper plate, yes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

I usually use key lime pies in a borosilicate pie plate. Blood really goes well with the tartness of the limes.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I mean, they are a professional clown, they prpbably have weirder drawers.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I have a drawer i keep the things that stop cream pies in.

They never leave the drawe

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

By the emperor...!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

That was so fine. Top notch.

[–] Ensign_Crab 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Speak for yourself. I keep mine in a safe.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

That's just responsible pie ownership

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 50 points 2 weeks ago

If this were real and ungay, that's a keeper.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 weeks ago

well thats the thing with clowns, once it starts coming out it just keeps on coming

[–] roguetrick 33 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Even children's hospitals aren't paying someone to be a full time clown. Unless they're in administration.

[–] _stranger_ 9 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Anon isn't American

[–] feedum_sneedson 31 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

stop trying to make clussy happen

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 weeks ago

Clussy is real ,stop blaspheming.

[–] Skullgrid 12 points 2 weeks ago

it's already too late

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

Oh its Clappening

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I thought it was called a "clown hole"

[–] _stranger_ 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Only if it's made outside the Clussy region of France.

[–] Skullgrid 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Then it's only fizzy clown vagina? 🤮

[–] _stranger_ 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] Skullgrid 3 points 2 weeks ago

this is a perfect post. I congratulate you and wish to ascend to your level someday.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Thank you for this

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

I have news for you

[–] ikidd 26 points 2 weeks ago

As long as it's a mutual creampie.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Dogiedog64 6 points 2 weeks ago

Need me a clown gf frfr 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

Holy based!