this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2024
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The Onion

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The Onion

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[–] aeronmelon 38 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I know this is satire because there is no way Trump has any musical talent.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It would also require effort and a degree of hand-eye coordination not typical for those in his age group with his degree of mental deterioration.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

For a lot of geriatric musicians, playing is basically muscle memory.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That also takes dedicating a good chunk of time to practice.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Many elderly people don't have a lot to do with their time, so that seems like a good thing

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

...contingent on having built that memory from years of practice. I don't know if there's any instrument I can imagine Trump playing, aside from tooting his own horn even when there's nothing to toot about.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Honestly, if this ever really happened it would be one thing that actually might make me want to see such a rally.

[–] just_another_person 21 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Jokes on you, Onion, because that is very clearly a Vibraphone and not a Glockenspiel. DEUUUUHHHHHHHH

[–] Viking_Hippie 4 points 2 months ago

Glockenspiel is a much funnier word, though 😁

[–] chuckleslord 2 points 2 months ago

Me, a true musician, they're all just sound sticks you hit. Unlike rain sticks (sound sticks you flip) and drum sticks (sound sticks to hit with)

[–] BassTurd 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Came for the headline, stayed for the picture, and really enjoyed the article. Well done The Onion.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

You should really look into their print edition that they just relaunched, then! Really cheap and a great way to support the new ownership.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

And I’m sure it was the Best glockenspiel performance ever. Professional musicians have likely told him they’ve never heard anything as great.

[–] p5yk0t1km1r4ge 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I really hate this timeline. We are at a point now where I thought this was legit

[–] lulztard 6 points 2 months ago

Oh. It's the onion. Didn't realize until well after deep into comments.

[–] morphballganon 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

He could always play classical... though that might cause his followers to grow some brain cells and leave.

[–] Phegan 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I've never understood why classic is "smart people music".

I like a lot of classic music, but I don't think it should be considered any more cultured or intellectual than any other music.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

I know of one dude that listens to classical music while working - manual, not particularly brain intensive, but somehow he manages to be too daft for that anyway and does a shoddy job. He's a contractor in a niche field tho, and there's not a whole lot of them around, so his job security doesn't strictly hinge on quality.

It's definitely not "smart people music".

[–] RizzRustbolt 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

And he's a damned virtuoso.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

A true idiot

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

I'm a Republican who Does His Own Research and The Onion is LIBRUL PROPAGANDA! WAKE UP Sheeple! Kid Rock would GLADLY play at Trump's Rally! The Onion is the DEEP STATE!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Feeling hot hot hot!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

If only there weren't Republican musicians ...