Humor, jokes, memes about TTRPGs
Image transcription:
I'll start:
Your turn
Hard mode: Try not to include closer to domain-specific things like javascript library names
Python runtime. Time for you to run from these pythons bitch.
BSOD. Pretty self-explanatory
Agile development. Raises Dex everytime a new enemy enters vision.
Kernel Space - banishes the target to a plane of existence filled with corn
B Tree - an AOE summon of a permanent swarm of bees in the targeted area until the bees all die or leave naturally
Monad - device that transmutes one set of spell components into another. These can be strung together to form very complex things.
Extended Backus-Naur Form - Allows one to transform into a memetic form to be carried in the mind of another; also extends to your clothing and any carried items.
Bounds execption: Allows larger objects to fit in smaller containers, ritual spell effective for 1 day, can be upcast to increase amount of "overfill", some check when retrieving the item for a chance of "corruption" (small chance to retrieve a different item, or have the "overfill" become something different like have the outer edge of a bar of gold be meat)
Paralellization: High level time magic, Allows the target multiple turns to be taken simultaneously, but an equivalent cooldown afterwards (waiting for all threads or jobs to return before being able to continue), so 3 turns at once means 2 turns the target can't do anything after.
Split brain configuration: Allows focusing on multiple concentration checks/spells at once. This could also be called paralellization, or multithreaded.
Pass By Reference enchantment: requires two identical items. Once enchanted, changes to one happen to both. Room for all sorts of shenanigans.
Private field: cast on an area to prevent entry/visibility into it by unauthorized entities. Sounds inside are not audible to unauthorized entities outside of it.
Parallelization would make high level casters utterly broken. One of my favorite spells, because I made it for 3.5 edition, and I haven't had a DM criticize the spell, is Unfailing Missiles. If I could cast three of them in parallel, I would be able to hit up to 9 targets that are no more than 20° arcs from the last target, each with a missile that does 17d (6+1) points of Force/Sonic Damage split 50/50. Or I can use all of those missile on a single target. If I maximize the spell with 3 12th level spell slots, that's 1,071 damage or 119 damage per missile. There's no save, please refer to the name of the spell. This is basically a 9th level Magic Missile. If I see you, I wollop you.
I had a bit too much fun with these :)
Transmission Control Protocol - Modifies teleportation and summoning to be very specific.
Universal Datagram Protocol - see "Shout"
The Privilege Escalation hits hard
This just reinforces that one short of piratesoftware saying all programmers are wizards.
Rust - rusts metal. When miscast, makes the target a crab of some sort
Go - Same as "command" spell
Regular Expression - makes any cryptic message understandable in a language you know
Transfer Protocol - allows the teleportation of one packet to a willing host
Read Only - cast on a book, scroll or any other thing with written words. Ensures no further words can be written. No scribbles or any sort of artwork will stick either. The object can still be destroyed
Icon - For a short period, the target of the spell becomes a beloved, or hated, icon of a subject. IE: beloved icon of beauty, hated icon of music.
Master Boot Record - this magical list contains all the master level boots ever created and their current whereabouts
Partition Table - allows any object with at least 2 flat sides to be cut into any shape
Default Gateway
Split Horizon
Routing Overhead
Broadcast Storm
edit:fkn markdown
Split Horizon with Poison Reverse
Split Horizon sounds really high-level.
Artificers use assembly language to cast their spells.
1st level wild shape ability byte.
4th level wild shape ability megabyte.
8th level wild shape ability gigabyte.
9th level wild shape ability terabyte
Bonus 0th level ability: nibble
Memory leak
Destructor
Dynamic dispatch
Execute
Ping of death
Bash
Vim (clearly a buff)
Vim (clearly a buff)
That's some grand wizard who's made some named spells. Vim's Inescapable Hut being the most known one.
Not necessarily PC related, but:
Uninterrupted Power Supply
Memoization
Easily my vote for the most unweildy named concept in software development.
It always reads like a typo of memorization. Not exactly an accident, of course. Memorize is memory + -ize, while memoize is memo + -ize, and memo is short for memorandum, which comes from memory. Both terms refer to some kind of storage and retreival of information. The similarities are deliberate.
My gripe with it is that memo in my head exclusively refers to a one-paragraph email sent to my company to notify me about something. Not remembering something. Definitely not the very specific case of linking input parameters to results of pure functions.
So we have this made-up word that looks suspiciously like an existing word that is related and means something related but is not the same thing, and the words it is actually adapted from don't mean the thing it's supposed to mean. Thanks, I hate it.
Really ought to call memoization what it what it really is. Lazy-loaded lookup tables.
Can you tell what's my job?
I target you and cast polymorphism.
Power word (sudo) Kill!
Curiously Recurring Template Pattern (basically crop circles)
They're also as mysterious as crop circles in programming. I know how it works but I'm not going to explain to the next poor sap. Such an antipattern. It's in the name, don't do this sort of shit. Stop being clever. Your code should be dumb as fuck
Oomkiller
Hyperconvergence or hypervisor.
Scroll lock. To protect your scrolls.
Think that's that wizards get when they're having trouble studying.
Polymorphism
Encapsulation kinda sounds like it could be a spell too. That's 2/3 pillars of OOP.
The last one was atomization, right? Gets a bit out of fantasy, but can definitely sound magical
Memory Leak
That one would also be a good name for an EDM group
It's the lower level spell to use when someone's been hit with Disintegrate. Much cheaper than True Res.
