this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

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top 24 comments
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[–] STRIKINGdebate2 1 points 3 weeks ago

Please add a NSFW tag to this post. Please. Thank you

[–] FelixCress 72 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Or you can just wank. It is a sustainable, eco friendly, net zero solution.

[–] idiomaddict 61 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

That’ll only produce cum for about half the population. As always, half of us are supposed to subsist on grool.

I’m sorry about this already

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

I volunteer for grool tribute

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago

And think about this: unlike celery, it's a true calorie-negative snack.

Cause, you know, thermodynamics.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

"Organic handmade"

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 weeks ago

Did manga artist write this?

[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper 31 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

"for easy use"

For WHAT use???

Also unrelated, I have to take medicine (for now) every night against reflux / heart burn, it's made of some type of algae to thicken up gastric juice so it doesn't flow back to your esophagus. This is a small tube filled which a thick, white, sticky, salty liquid. Which I swallow every night. It looks exactly as you imagine.

[–] IndiBrony 17 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

*unzips*

No, don't stop. Tell me more.

[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper 10 points 3 weeks ago

I am well prepared to guzzle cum lmao, been training for weeks now

[–] Korne127 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper 1 points 3 weeks ago

It's called Gaviscon but idk if it is available or has the same name outside of Germany

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago

I was fully expecting one of the steps to just be the guy jizzing in to the bowl Xd

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] LesserAbe 9 points 3 weeks ago

For making porn of course

[–] Lost_My_Mind 18 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Nah man. Just get a toaster pastry. The kind with that packet of frosting. It looks just like cum. Tastes delicious though.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

Right, was thinking the same, just make some icing. Literally powdered sugar and water, mix til you get the consistency you're going tor.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago
[–] ekZepp 3 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I always forget that you can eat raw eggs in some other countries. America doesn't deal with salmonella well

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

it was a trope for boxing and weightlifting and such in movied

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'd say making paper glue is close enough. You can make it by just putting some flour in water and boiling it (I don't remember the exact dosage but it's easy to find).

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

listened to a podcast who interviewed a porn set worker and they use the flour and water method according to him

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

I believe liquid hand soap is the go-to for fake cumshots. Let me know if that's invalid.