this post was submitted on 15 Aug 2024
923 points (96.8% liked)

Microblog Memes

5848 readers
1907 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Lemminary 107 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Relevant and accurate. I'm none of these things.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 months ago (7 children)

Well, there is a statistical association between being born with a penis and being physically strong, although obviously it doesn't apply to everyone. The power tool things is just a total invention of society though.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

My peen make it easier for me to build muscle mass! Which I don't take advantage of so instead I am just hairy everywhere except the part of my head that would look fashionable with hair. Can I just trade those things for being good at power tools instead?

[–] pyre 10 points 3 months ago (3 children)

yeah comparing that to astrology is a bit much. i get it, you can't know for sure what gender a person is going to be, but it's still likely to coincide with their sex, mostly through societal factors anyway.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] problematicPanther 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

i think everyone should enjoy power tools, both penised and non-penised individuals.

[–] snow_bunny 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

When you think about it, a sewing machine is a power tool of sorts.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Blue_Morpho 6 points 3 months ago (3 children)

power tool things is just a total invention of society

Which is why I don't understand people who need to change themselves physically to conform to society's expectations.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They have been told all their lives "you are expected to behave this way! The way you want to behave is only acceptable for them!" It's not really that surprising.
If we could purge the sexist tropes from society that would probably do wonders for gender dysphoria.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

I wonder how much is dysphoria and how much is dysmorphia.

I don't think I care much about what's in my pants, but I do care that other people want me to act a certain way because of that.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

That's the excuse I use we're not going to the gym.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

i too am nonbinary

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Right, much like how astrologists will tell you there's an association between being born under [astrological sign] and having [personality trait]. It doesn't apply to everyone...

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 87 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[–] cosmicrose 57 points 3 months ago (3 children)

I keep all my genders and related information in KeePronounXC, which stores my pronouns in an encrypted format locally. It also lets me generate new, complex genders so I can use a unique one per relationship.

[–] Huschke 14 points 3 months ago

As long as you're following the 3-2-1 rule, I see no problem with storing your genders locally.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

my pronouns have a public key to allow others to recognize me consistently but also a private key that reflects a deep understanding of the factors that generate that public key

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

For extra security you should also be Genderfluid for every relationship that supports it. Either by using Time-based One Time Pronouns or even more secure with a Hardware Token using the WebGendn Protocol to authenticate via Public-Private-Gender-Encryption.

[–] Zorque 55 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 months ago (1 children)

What sort of gender is *******?

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (8 children)

So, ~~this is~~ I have a dumb joke and need to explain far too much for it to be funny, but don't think that would stop me:

In German, we do this thing where nouns for jobs have gender, so a male teacher is a "Lehrer" and a female teacher is a "Lehrerin".

Now, if you want to refer to any teacher independent of gender, traditionally you used the male form.
This was found to bias people to more readily employ men, worsening gender inequality. So, we started writing things as "Lehrer/in" to show that both genders are meant.

Then several more genders got released, so to show that non-binaries are also included, we came up with the Gendersternchen™: Lehrer*in

It's the ~~cousin of Rumpelstilzchen~~ "gender asterisk" and very popular with the conservatives, I can assure you.

Anyways, the dumb joke is that therefore ******* is the gender that's so fluid, they had to just make it a bunch of Gendersternchen. 🙃

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Anyways, the dumb joke is that therefore ******* is the gender that’s so fluid, they had to just make it a bunch of Gendersternchen

I admire the dedication of providing all the context for this joke, and it's amazing.

But does that imply not only the gender is fluid, but also the profession? 🤔

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

not only the gender is fluid, but also the profession?

Gig economy contract work

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago

i need a whole lemmy community of non-English language jokes highly explained to me in translation please

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's the ~~cousin of Rumpelstilzchen~~ "gender asterisk" and very popular with the conservatives, I can assure you.

The ability of conservatives everywhere to find something to be offended by truly inspires.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

Oh yeah, you have no idea. They're crying out that their free speech is being taken away, because supposedly they're forced to use the Gendersternchen. And they do that, while they are enacting laws to prohibit government institutions (including schools and such) to use gendered language. It is so ridiculously dumb.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

one * is enough for an all gender glob

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

this would be regular expression not glob tho

i think Gendersternchen is closer to globbing than to regex

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Given where it is in the thread, I think it's supposed to be a reference to an ancient meme rather than that.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

Yeah, I completely glossed over the hunter2 joke, and rather just wanted to make my own joke.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Brilliant, I love it.

All the better for your explanation!

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Orc@ for me

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 months ago (1 children)

still crackable with rainbow-tables

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

LGBT: brute forcing new ~~passwords~~ pronouns every day

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I prefer a gender-phrase, a complex sequence of words that's easier to remember and more secure than a single gender-word.

For example, contrast "female" with "do all the guys you know wear dresses and makeup like this?"

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

"do all the guys you know wear dresses and makeup like this"

Femboy erasure :(

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (3 children)

My pronouns are "I" and "me". I should probably get that changed.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago

Yes, I think I should.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago

That's like, the most commonly used.

Brb, I'm just stealing your identity before you get round to changing that.

[–] surewhynotlem 4 points 3 months ago

There's the sort of thing an idiot would have on his luggage!

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Just use a pronoun manager. That also makes it easier to use a different one for each domain

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

whats the master pronoun though?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm not a cis man but a "c!s m4n"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Maybe you should remove the space to be compatible with places that don't allow them in genders and could even swap letters to make dictionary attacks harder. c!ms4n.

[–] renzev 16 points 3 months ago

This post reminds me of those "attack helicopter" jokes from 2016, except this time it's actually funny and not hurtful

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago
[–] WiseWoodchuck 9 points 3 months ago

Where should I hide my pr0n? Dm-crypt? The safety passphrase is BSDjailMeDaddy.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago
load more comments
view more: next ›