this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2024
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The Onion

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The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 71 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I thought the onion only did satire?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago

They’re doing a seminar for fat white men interested in bad hair plugs

[–] SpaceNoodle 56 points 4 months ago

This is "Not The Onion" material. It's real.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 4 months ago (1 children)

i was wondering when the onion would say "fuck it...we're just going to print straight facts"

[–] Lost_My_Mind 15 points 4 months ago

When The Onion started, it was EASY to make absurdist political satire. How do you make absurdist political satire in 2024? How do you make up crazier shit than real life???

If anything, they should print seemingly boring, but untrue headlines about tax reform, or international trade policy.

[–] xantoxis 32 points 4 months ago

“Just don’t expect any hardballs. Elon is [...] unlikely to ask him anything that could harm his election prospects."

I think Elon is just as likely to fuck this up as Trump is. Between the two of them, I'd put a lot of money that he says something that hurts him.

[–] ChicoSuave 15 points 4 months ago (3 children)

The real question is who will first sniff the chair of the other? I'm betting Elon sniffs Trump's chair, then Trump sniffs Elon's chair, then Vance comes last.

[–] Clent 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Vance is still trying to get off the couch.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago

Bold of you to assume he reciprocates.

[–] pivot_root 6 points 4 months ago

Vance is the footrest. His opportunity comes after everyone else leaves.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

Then the janitor actually gets on stage last, because once Vance is gone those chairs need to be thrown away, preferably incinerated.

[–] Hobbes_Dent 9 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

“Hey, neighbour.”

Edit: “So let’s get down to discussing shit. I feel there is a taint on our relationship because of gas.”

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

This interview may be tainted.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

The Tainterview of the century.

[–] Thteven 7 points 4 months ago

Which one is which?

[–] someguy3 2 points 4 months ago

Business genius becomes podcaster in next business venture.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

The Onion, telling it like it is since 2016