this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2024
736 points (96.6% liked)

Greentext

4494 readers
1566 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 198 points 3 months ago (4 children)

The intrinsic intolerance hidden just beneath the veneer of an accepting society drives us straight to the bottom and splits us in two, whether it be sexuality, race, or lactose. Whoever needs to hear it, it’s okay to be gay, black, or a milk drinker.

[–] [email protected] 167 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (5 children)

Fuck that. Fuck you. Fuck milk drinkers. Oh, you want milkies? Oh, you wanna suck titty juice like a baby? You gonna cry? Gonna piss your pants? Maybe shit and cum?

I’ll be here drinking apple juice with my chicken nuggies and mac and cheese like a REAL big kid

[–] [email protected] 71 points 3 months ago

I pray that you might eventually join me in a society beyond lactose intolerance, my wayward friend.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Yeah, but straight from the carton? In public?

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 182 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It depends on how you drink it.

[–] Alpha71 40 points 3 months ago

I still can't believe they put that in Mortal Kombat.

[–] [email protected] 93 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 67 points 3 months ago (3 children)
[–] hakunawazo 37 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (4 children)

Weird criminals drink milk, normal people drink orange juice.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] rektdeckard 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)

My partner and I once went as Leon and Matilda for Halloween. I finished off a quart of milk and filled it with pre-mixed negroni cocktai to sneak it into a party as part of my costume. Boy howdy, I was so drunk I was speaking in tongues at the end of the night.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 59 points 3 months ago

Fucking milk drinker walking around Skyrim.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

I can’t help but wonder if people were laughing at something besides the milk. Were they wearing a Sailor Moon outfit, complete with wig?

[–] dohpaz42 49 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Would you risk openly laughing at a dude drinking milk, dressed as Sailor Moon?

[–] Iheartcheese 34 points 3 months ago

I'd be too busy masturbating

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)

absolutely not. In the name of the moon (and milk), they'd punish me

[–] rovingnothing29 13 points 3 months ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

No one was laughing, this is all fantasy in OOP's head

[–] [email protected] 40 points 3 months ago (18 children)

Folks really need to normalize casually drinking milk the same way people drink CO2-infused sugar water. Milk is delicious and a great base source of nutrients.

[–] TomAwsm 22 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Move over, Hydro Homies. Now is the time for Milk Mates.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago (7 children)

I'll meet you half way with some CO2-infused milk.

load more comments (7 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

OP was drinking milk out of the carton. I'd side-eye someone walking around drinking a 2 liter just as hard.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

You're right, we need water fountains with milk instead

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (15 replies)
[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 months ago
[–] chemical_cutthroat 30 points 3 months ago (5 children)

Milk is fucking delicious.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago

Drinking milk straight from the carton, in public?

Have you no self respect, Anon?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 months ago (1 children)

We're jealous you can drink milk at all without shitting yourself violently.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] jaybone 18 points 3 months ago

Add some kahlua and vodka. You got a White Russian goin’.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago

Too many lactose intolerant people.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (6 children)

his mistake was that it wasn't beer (alcohol) /s

Honestly, this reminds me of the "facebook crisis": it's forbidden to show a nipple publicly on facebook, but they accept pictures of guns. Really shows you their values and ideals.

load more comments (6 replies)
[–] Sarmyth 17 points 3 months ago

What's a milk drinker like you doing out here? Go home to your mother!

[–] _lilith 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

One time I was working a late shift in winter and I just needed something warm. I heated up some water and just poured it into my coffee cup. My co-worker looked at me like I was crazy and told me I was a "weird cat" which in itself is kind of ironic. Then he proceeds to fill his coffee mug with diet dr pepper and walk out into a blizzard like it was nothing.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (2 children)

They know you paid for a cow to be raped, anon. They know you're a nasty carnist

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] CascadianGiraffe 12 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Anon was Canadian so the milk was a gallon in an awkward plastic bag.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] Etterra 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago

Fake? On 4chan‽ Say it ain't so!

load more comments
view more: next ›