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Sofia "Buff Girlfriend" @sofiabuffgf
Installing a bidet at home was life changing but unfortunately it's transformed pooping on company time from a small proletarian victory into yet another grueling humiliation of inadequate working conditions.
I relate to this on such a deep level. I really dread using any toilet that doesn't have a bidet now. I can't figure out why they aren't everywhere . It has to be better for the environment.
Imagine the filth in your average public restroom.
Now imagine if they were all designed with powerful fountains that spray water up and out of the device if not intercepted by an anus.
I’m pretty sure “this is why we can’t have nice things” is true in this case, just pre-emptively.
The wonderful thing about every bidet I've ever used is that they require intentional actions to be activated. I have never gotten a surprise spray yet.
Surprises of that sort aren’t really the problem, tho that would be.. wild.
The intentional abuse of the devices would be the problem, as would unintentional misuse (eg they are in the wrong position and it misses entirely, or they don’t know what it is and mess with the controls while standing in front of it).
First thing I did after installing a bidet was shoot water 3m onto a wall.
Same, honestly. You have to make sure it works and you don’t really think to cover it, and even if you did you don’t really know where..
And then you find out. And giggle a bit.
You're right. There is nothing stopping folks from throwing toilet paper (clean or dirty) all over the public restroom on purpose and I have spent enough time in airport bathrooms to know that people can make a mess perfectly fine with how restrooms are kitted out today.
I was in Japan for two weeks and not once did I use a toilet without a bidet. It was glorious.
I don't know if I'd trust a public bidet, the amount of poop people leave on the toilet seat doesn't give me confidence they wouldnt find a way to get their explosive slosh into the nozzle
Go for a portable one. Be clean and proud. Nobody is gonna ask you about the flask-thing anyway unless they want one. https://www.happypo.de/ No idea if it has a translated site, but it's quite butt-forward anyhow.
We have those in the US as well. They're meant for women who just gave birth to clean their privates. The hospital gave my wife 3 that we got to take home since they can't reuse them.
I don’t think I’ve seen a post that spoke so strongly to me
That said. Working at a Japanese company has some perks like this in particular
I got to learn to love those bidet toilets through my frequent (extended) work travels to Japan. Got one for myself at home when the bathroom was up for renovation. Now I am dreading any work trip to not-Japan because I'll have to shit like a barbarian for that time.
I know corporate overlords wish there could be, but I don't think we're at the point of having someone in there with you to check that you're actually pooping just yet..
So poop at home, then just sit there and catch up on your scrolling on company time..
Do you guys have that much control over when and where you poop? I see this idea of "just hold it in until you get to your preferred location" fairly regularly and that seems insane to me. It's not like my poops are an imminent emergency every time but I definitely couldn't hold it in more than an hour or maybe two on the high end, and that would be pretty uncomfortable. That's not enough time to get home in many cases. In other words, when it hits, I shits.
I generally go once in the morning (going from being horizontal in bed to being vertical out of it usually does the trick) then I'm done for the day. But even if I have to go again I can generally hold it at least for a bit unless it's a food poisoning type situation.. ¯\(ツ)/¯
But then, digestive systems vary widely, so all that matters is what's normal for you.
I am not a Doctor.
At the risk of providing TMI, one way to go is to basically schedule it by training your body to go at consistent times of day. Eventually, your circadian rhythms and your bowel work together and you're on track. More from actual doctors here; advice is for constipation but the gist is the same.
Edit: strong coffee with breakfast really helps.
I use coffee to my advantage of planning my poops, I like to get to work early for partly the reason of being able to poop while the restroom is still cleanish
to check that you’re actually pooping
AI will do that soon. Until then, managers can ask employees to donate vacation hours to make up for people who take too long in the bathroom.
AI will do that soon.
I guess pass that hurdle when we get to it..
managers can ask employees to donate vacation hours to make up for people who take too long in the bathroom.
They can ask lol
Using just toilet paper is like if a bird shit on your arm and you used toilet paper to wipe it off. There's still shit on your arm - you're still dirty and need to wash it off. Bidets are really superior in every way.
I mean, If a bird shit on me, I wouldn't consider myself clean if I just hosed it off with water either. Soap needs to be involved. Bidet or TP is just a stopgap until you actually wash your ass. With soap.
Wash up in the sink. Or the water cooler.
I've always wondered, why aren't Bidet Showers(aka the bum gun) more popular in the west? Should be a far more cheaper and similarly hygienic option no?
I don't have too much experience with this style, so this is probably completely unfair... but I lived with a guy for a bit who brought his own portable version that hooks up to the sink... and dude would constantly leave water everywhere no matter what we'd tell him. So I def prefer the in-seat style based on my lack of trust for the humans using them.
I generally carry a portable bidet when I travel for this reason. But yes, I'm traveling in Japan right now and it's great. Also the fact that the bathrooms are clean.
A (single use) water bottle with a sport cap is basically a portable bidet. One can even easily adjust the water pressure.
Portable bidets are great for work!
With my pocket bidet, pocket pussy, pocket watch and pocket knife, I'm officially pocket-challenged.
What an amazing day to have eyes.
Now I take baby wipes backpacking with me. I can't go back to dry poopy butt after owning a bidet for years.
