this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2024
1103 points (98.6% liked)

Science Memes

10853 readers
3818 users here now

Welcome to c/science_memes @ Mander.xyz!

A place for majestic STEMLORD peacocking, as well as memes about the realities of working in a lab.



Rules

  1. Don't throw mud. Behave like an intellectual and remember the human.
  2. Keep it rooted (on topic).
  3. No spam.
  4. Infographics welcome, get schooled.

This is a science community. We use the Dawkins definition of meme.



Research Committee

Other Mander Communities

Science and Research

Biology and Life Sciences

Physical Sciences

Humanities and Social Sciences

Practical and Applied Sciences

Memes

Miscellaneous

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 121 points 7 months ago (7 children)

I'd be more suspicious of a person coming to my door purely just to educate me on cool science things. I wouldn't be able to shake the feeling that he's trying to sell me something.

At least with religion I know their game and I know I'm not interested but science that's interesting.

[–] EdibleFriend 71 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They spend an hour talking about the possibility of life on Venus then they whip out the vacuum cleaner

[–] slazer2au 18 points 7 months ago

Better than a set of steak knives. Because that conversation goes very differently.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 7 months ago (1 children)

listen, you know you want that encyclopedia. imgaine how good it would look. women will swoon at your big books. you know what big books mean.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 7 months ago (1 children)

A man who has big books... has a big... bookshelf.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 7 months ago

and big brains, thats right.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They sing a song about the vastness of space and then they start harvesting your organs.

[–] cm0002 12 points 7 months ago

Did somebody say...organs...

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago (1 children)

That's how vampires get in the door. Don’t fall for it.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] AgentOrangesicle 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I'd be more suspicious of them telling me life exists on Venus, specifically. Last I heard it was a hot-ass gaseous atmosphere made of acid. My money is still on Europa.

[–] Kase 14 points 7 months ago

Boy, have I got news for you!


/j

[–] EvolvedTurtle 3 points 7 months ago

I'd be hella suspicious untill he left while not selling me anything

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] someguy3 72 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Have you found the scientific method.

[–] Sterile_Technique 53 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I think so, but let's test it just to be sure.

[–] model_tar_gz 18 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Certainty I can’t help you with, but statistical confidence let’s go.

[–] Sterile_Technique 11 points 7 months ago

Good observation - I'll include that in my notes and come back later with a finer-tuned hypothesis!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 42 points 7 months ago (2 children)

If I ever win a lottery I'm legit going to pay someone to do this.

[–] Dasus 28 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

Man you don't need to win the lottery. I'll do it for a moderate fee.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Great! But I need to win the lottery in order to be able to pay your moderate fee.

[–] angrystego 8 points 7 months ago

Thats why this would never happen. The religious people do it for free or they even pay their organisation.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Depends, how moderate we talking?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Toneswirly 22 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Wouldnt happen. Scientists are too in love with the possibility they are wrong. Little room for evangelism

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Only because they often are... which is what makes science so great. If everything was thought to be correct, what good would testing and new discovery be? The fact that scientists have historically been wrong drives scientists to prove other scientists wrong.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Mr_Blott 21 points 7 months ago (5 children)

Right, please tell me. Is this just a meme thing or do people actually knock on other people's doors to try to convert them to their religion?

And does this only happen, bizarrely, in the country with the highest number of gun-owning cowards?

It just seems such an odd combination

[–] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Jehovas witnesses knocking on doors is an absolutely known thing in Germany.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 7 months ago (1 children)

And in Sweden.

Fun fact, their meeting places, "Kingdom hall"s are translated "Rikets Sal". On more than one occasion the letters in their signs have been rearranged over night to "skitarsle", roughly "poopybutt" :D

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

And Japan. Also Mormons.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago

Ever heard of Jehovah's witnesses? Or Mormons going on their mission? They aren't constant here, but they are definitely a thing in the Netherlands.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

It does. It got to the point I explained the concept of trial by combat to them, and said if they really believed, they would fight me-me armed them not.

Never worked.

So I got a grab bag of cheap sex toys to keep by the door the moment I got my first place (was homeless when I turned 18) and 'would you like to talk about Jesus' became 'trick or treat'.

That worked.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

Nope. I'm in Canada and it happens here too.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ceenote 21 points 7 months ago

"Is life on Venus coming to kill us?"

"Oh, no, these are microorganis-"

Shuts door

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

I’ve found the fastest ways to get religious folk that knock on my door to scurry in a hurry is:

  1. offer to listen as long as they like but only after they roast a bowl with you
  2. tell them to pay their fucking taxes

Now if science folk came knockin that would be great over a roasted bowl as well

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

Smoke marijuana in a bong or pipe

The bowl being the part of the bong or pipe that holds the marijuana

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Ah... Thanks for the info, kind stranger

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

https://www.theguardian.com/science/1999/aug/24/spaceexploration

"I [Carl Sagan] can remember one occasion, taking a shower with my wife while high, in which I had an idea on the origins and invalidities of racism in terms of gaussian distribution curves," wrote the former Cornell University professor. "I wrote the curves in soap on the shower wall, and went to write the idea down."

[–] homesweethomeMrL 15 points 7 months ago

Yes. Yes I would, come in, come in!

[–] NocturnalMorning 14 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Yeah, uhh, come in, how'd you know I was a space nerd? Would you also like to scope out my house to rob it later? That's fine too, as long as you tell me about this cool space fact.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Instructions unclear, we now have door to door scientologists instead

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Pretty sure I'm allowed to shoot those in this state.

[–] Maggoty 9 points 7 months ago

I'd have so many questions. In a good way. They wouldn't have time to visit anyone else that day.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago

This idea made my pp hard

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

Phosphine

"No thanks. I don't believe in Greek goddesses."

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (3 children)

i wonder what has happened that enabled or hindered science to not become evangelical

[–] OccamsRazer 4 points 7 months ago

What do you think it would it look like if it did?

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] mvirts 6 points 7 months ago

I would do that... but a bit of linux evangelism would slip in as well 😹

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago
[–] mriormro 5 points 7 months ago

"please, just leave me alone"

load more comments
view more: next ›