this post was submitted on 07 Mar 2024
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NonCredibleDefense

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Know what a Grizwald is? A grenade. About the size of a battery. Responds to pressure. Our platoon was stuck in a trench outside of New Kasmir during the winter campaign. More'n a week, completely cut off, and the Alliance entrenched not ten yards away. We even got to talkin' to 'em, yelling across insults and jokes and such, 'cause no ammo to speak of, no orders, so what are you gonna do? We mentioned that we were out of rations, and ten minutes later, a bunch of apples rained into the trench. Cap said wait, but they were so hungry. Don't make much noise. Just little pops and there's three guys that kind of just end at the ribcage.

[–] SpaghettiYeti 8 points 8 months ago

I just watched this. Watching Serenity literally right now too. So good...

[–] DaMonsterKnees 6 points 8 months ago

I will try not to be offended.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 8 months ago (1 children)

We aren't sorry and we will do it again.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago (2 children)

it'd be a lot cooler if we didn't

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Our warcrimes: based and redpilled Your warcrimes: cringe and bluepilled

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

maplepilled

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

It'd be a lot cooler if we were never in that situation again.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 8 months ago (5 children)

What was stopping them from just hucking grenades over to the Germans to begin with? You don't typically have to exploit trust of the enemy on the battlefield to throw a grenade.

[–] ForgotAboutDre 48 points 8 months ago

It's much more effective if they are grouped together waiting to catch the grenade. It also reveals the position of the soldiers in the trench.

Grenades aren't very effective in trenches, unless the victim is close by. The narrow shape and curves of the trench can shield a person from a nearby blast.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago (1 children)

If you're in a trench in wartime and fist sized object comes flying in from the direction of the enemy forces you're going to dive away from it and take cover. But then the thrown object turns out to be a can of food, not an explosive.

So how do you respond to the next thrown item? Do you still dive for cover?

The rational answer is "yes." The starving soldier desperate for a break from the fighting answer was not.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Plus trenches have dugouts and the like. You can imagine that after the first round of corned beef, people were probably waking their mates up, yelling at everyone to get out here and see what's happening.

It's ingenious, in a horrifyingly cruel way.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago

It's funnier this way

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago

Style points?

[–] psmgx 1 points 7 months ago

Trenches are ideally built with shelters, curves, zig-zags, etc. to reduce the effects of direct hits from explosives. Plus you may only hit one guy, while playing games with them can get you several more

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago

The Geneva Conventions, AKA, the "The List of Things That Canada is No Longer Allowed to Do."

[–] Toneswirly 13 points 8 months ago (4 children)

Damn I thought Canadians were supposed to be polite.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 8 months ago

We made sure they didn't die on an empty stomach.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

wait til you hear about the mounties

There's a lot to love about Canada, but our closets are overflowing with skeletons.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

They'll taze ya all the way dead in the airport you're stuck in. Absolute templates for ACAB.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

As the saying goes, "Fear the anger of a patient man."

[–] cynar 2 points 8 months ago

British politeness developed mostly so we didn't turn our aggression inwards. Given how large the British empire got, it was quite effective.

Canadians seem to have taken this further. Impeccably polite, but that rage needs to go somewhere. The only thing worse than an angry Canadian is a "disappointed" Canadian. That's when you know you need to find cover!

[–] DaMonsterKnees 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Do you guys know what a Griswald is?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago

No, but I've seen their Christmas Vacation.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Sounds like a good strategy to me. Exploiting an enemy's weakness is standard practice in war.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I mean, one could argue this was a beautiful moment of humanity amidst unrelenting savagery, shattered by a callous pack of assholes.

Or

You can say "Lol, get fucked Krauts. Btw we know Wilhelm was planning to Manifest Destiny Africa."

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

Canadians have always taken the approach that war is a bad thing, and trying to pretend otherwise is stupid.

You don't try to be a gentleman to the man who is trying to kill. You kill him first. That way you get to go home.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Well that sounds bad (like war in general).

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Especially since it was WW1. I wouldn't feel so bad if it was WW2 and Nazis were being unalived, but nobody deserved to die in WW1.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Eh.

Wilhelm II kind of deserved to get executed. The deeper you look into that guy the worse he gets. Obviously there were bastards all around but that shit was genuinely his fault.

Didn't happen, obviously, because consequences are for peasants.

[–] cynar 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

In WWI, Neither sets of soldiers wanted to be there. Neither wanted to fights, and neither had been conditioned to see the enemy as subhuman.

This led to numerous examples of comaradary. The most famous example being the Christmas football match.

WWII was the first example of industrialised propaganda. The Nazis were conditioned to believe they were truly better, and so capable of doing the horrifying war crimes we now know happen.

WWI, the command was fairly evil on both sides, but the grunts weren't involved.

WWII, 1 sides command was particularly evil, and the grunts were convinced to agree with them.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Yep. WWI poetry is just so heartbreaking.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

WWI - yes, not necessarily specifically bcs of Nazis (one solder is just a human, exactly like the enemy solder), but because WWI was much more contained in fixed fronts, soldiers vs soldiers. Back then they still avoided civilians (but then tech advanced).

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

At least they didn’t have to blow up on an empty stomach

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

ah, the first SPAM bombing...

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

A very Canadian thing to do