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Pretty horrible. Wife wants a divorce and is unwilling to try and fix things. Barely communicates with me at all.
I met my stepson when he was 9 months old. He's 11 now. I'm the only father he knows. I'm devastated, because not only am I losing my wife, but I'm also losing my son, as I have no legal right to him. I'm estranged from the rest of my family, so the world is looking pretty cold and lonely from here.
If you have talked to a lawyer who has said that you have no legal right to see your stepson, it's worth talking to a different lawyer. If you have not talked to a lawyer, talk to a lawyer ASAP. Specifically, a lawyer that's at least familiar with the 4-part test in the Wisconsin Supreme Court case In re H.S.H-K. that shows a parent-like relationship. Even if you cannot afford to hire one to represent you, go for a one-time consultation.
Most states recognize that it's bad for children to rip them away from people that are like parents to them, and courts will order visitation. Many state courts have adopted Wisconsin's 4-part test, or have their own, similar doctrines. And these are strong arguments, with lots of jurisprudence behind them, that are worth raising in any divorce proceeding.
I'm not a lawyer, but I was a legal assistant at a family law firm. I saw too many men convinced that the courts were biased against fathers, so they didn't even try to fight for their kids. The men who did try (even without a lawyer) generally got custody, placement, or visitation to stay connected to their kids. In one case that sticks with me, we won court-ordered placement for a man who found out that his daughter with his ex-girlfriend wasn't his biological daughter after the ex wanted to cut him out of her life, and they did a paternity test. Even though they weren't married, and he had no biological or legal connection to the child, the court recognized the parent-like relationship, and found that it was in her best interest to continue it.
I guess what I'm saying is, don't conclude that you will lose your stepson unless and until a court says so.
Thatβs a really awful situation. I hope things get better. Maybe sheβll change her mind in the future and let you at least spend some time with him.
I'm sorry to hear that, bro. Do you have any hobbies or interests you can focus on?
I saw this and my first thought was: oh no Elmo, that's not a great thing to ask the internet....
Elmo thinks it's important to be careful on the internet and only ask appropriate questions. Elmo wants everyone to stay safe and have a positive online experience!
My almost-two-year-old dog is expected to die very suddenly from cancer at any time. She's the sweetest thing. I've even felt guilty that I've thought she's going to be a better dog (for me) than my older dog is, who is wonderful. But she'll never have the chance.
Meanwhile, my husband can't deal with the occasional accident her cancer is causing and is threatening not to get another dog, knowing full well that planning for the next dog is what keeps me going because my life is ruled by chronic health problems and I live for my dogs.
Edit: I guess the more succinct answer would be: Have you ever cried so hard you started to vomit?
My kitty died at 1.5y from something that wasnβt cancer, but the vet said it works like cancer. My heart aches for you. It took about a year to stop being sad and remember him being happy. Iβm sure youβve given your pup a good home. Enjoy what time you have left and youβll eventually remember the happy times.
Not too bad, but could be better.
A funny story about my not so great love life: just matched with a girl on Tinder which I managed to have engaging text discussions with and it felt quite genuine. This is rare for me, so I was happy about it.
Well, in the end it became obvious to me it was just a pig butchering romance scam when she started to talk about how she can help me invest in cryptocurrency.
I guess Iβm going to be a failure in love life for a bit longer lol.
As long as you love yourself, you're not a failure.
Thanks. Iβm content with my own solitude, but I can admit the affirmation I got from this event felt nice, even though it was all stimulated.
Good that you figured it out though, and wasted their time.
A little better tonight now that I figured out that the problem with my server isnβt the $1000 motherboard, but a $40 stick of RAM.
My boyfriend is getting more and more frequent panic attacks. He's at the end of his rope. I'm trying to get him therapy, but it took almost a year to convince him to let me sign him up for some. Today they contacted him to schedule an appointment...for a month from now. And he panicked about it so badly that he started sobbing at the end of his workday (while still at work).
He can't afford therapy, so I offered to pay. Which makes him feel guilty. His constant anxiety is keeping him from getting help for his constant anxiety. It's only going to get worse. And there's nothing I can do about it.
I just realized I didn't directly answer your question: terrible.
You're doing a lot. Don't let yourself tell you otherwise. My wife had lifelong GAD and panic disorder that was almost completely untreated for most of her life. Getting help wasn't easy but, it has literally been life-changing. Getting him help IS also helping you as it is very stressful to be the partner of someone with untreated mental illness.
Make sure to give yourself care too. You can't help if you're driven to breakdown yourself. It's hard and there are ups and downs but it will get better for both of you.
My asshole itches and my finger stinks.
I'm doing pretty good right now. I feel like I'm better than I've been. How are you?
That's great to hear! I've been doing okay, things have been up and down for me. Does Adam eat ass?
That's a real philosophical question there.
Its sad that these types of posts are always accompanied by a waterfall of unwell people.
Everyone is sad and stressed out man, we deserve better.
I'm....one of my big struggles is that I'm on a medication that reduces my appetite to almost nothing, and I eat almost nothing, and I'm enraging my SO by doing so. Everything tastes gross on this. The smell of my husband's dinner right now is revolting. I can't seem to get around it. Even junk food that I normally love tastes like wax and dust to me.
I absolutely have to be on it, but holy fuck it's hard on my life.
Honestly, I'd like to go to sleep right now. But otherwise, I'm excited and ready to fuckin' go...after a good night's sleep. Et tu, OP?
This time last year I would've said something completely different but I'm confident to say I'm now doing well. Of course not the best but well
Great. I razzle dazzled a couple higher ranked people at work today, and the fruits were that I get to present one of my projects to the top tech brass at our company next week. My new phone arrived. And I have a 2 day LAN party coming up this weekend.
Small promotion for [email protected] where we have a weekly thread asking people how they are doing.
Also, I know it's a Lemmy.world community, and they don't have the best reputation among people on lemmy.ml, so if people would prefer to contribute if they community was hosted elsewhere, feel free to let me know, I'll see if we can move it to a less divisive instance
I got laid off in early january, however I am getting a good settlement package, and have been to sveral interviews, so far I have rejected one position, and are working on others.
My car has a weird fault where if I drive it for long distances, then park and lock it it can quickly discharge the 12v battery and leave me stranded, getting that looked at next week, right now I feel like I can't trust it, and keep wondering if it will unlock when I press the button. It is a 2021 Seat Leon so it feels strange that it has this fault so early in it's life.
So yeah, this is what I am dealing with
Been worse. Been better, I guess. Most things in life are going apace.
My job is the best paying one I've ever had. It's still barely keeping my chin above water. My skill set normally would command a much higher salary, but the market is shit, and I've been holding onto this because of a pension it offers.
But a few years in I see that the increases might not be sustainable if things continue as they are. And I'm not growing much.
I had COVID the day after Christmas and still feeling crappy. Idk don't know if this is nornal. Doctors can't find anything wrong with me.
At this very moment I need to take a break from work to lie down and take a nap, I am completely out of energy. I had strong headaches yesterday the whole day.
I just need this to end, I want to have my life back.
I hope you don't have long COVID but it kind of sounds like it.
Thanks me too. It's very weird how long it's taking for me to recover but I honestly think it's my fault. I didn't rest at all during the time I was already sick to the point I even moved some freaking furniture around. Now I am paying for it. I also talked with the person who I supposedly got it from and he had it much worse to the point he had pneumonia from it and he's also not 100% yet. It might just be this new strain. That said, another doctor prescribed me a strong vitamin thing which is making me much better. This week I will also have another set of exams and etc, so I am crossing my fingers there will be progress and this will end.
Well I started writing chapter 6 in my book. Cleaned up my sister's place before she came home so I couldn't work on my book today. And, my dad's slowly getting better from his surgery and my mom isn't hurting anymore. So, all in all, a lot better than I was this time last month.
I'm waiting for a kidney.
other than that, ehh. the world turns, the wind blows, and life goes on. same as it ever was.
Could be worse but could be better.
If the negative aspects were gone though, my week would be golden.
Not doing good.
I'm sorry to hear that you're not doing well. If you feel comfortable, sharing more about what's going on might help, and I'm here to listen.
Nothing much. Disillusioned with the world itself. Disappointed that the place I was born in matters a lot.
I hate that my teen years went to shit studying and rote-learning. No dating, no hanging out, no friends, nothing. Now I kinda want to go back to the "springtime of youth".
I've experienced a lifestyle of "gamble economics", if that makes sense. Gamble your saving for a business, if it fails, you're fucked, if it works, you earn little - that's how my dad used to earn and also lose most of the time. There is no concept of "saving". Being conditioned into that childhood, I am always paranoid. I can't sleep at night.
I thought that being an adult would be liberating. It's not. It's horrible. You're an "uncle" to every little kid in your early 20s. You're also a creep, if you act un-adult-ly. By default, there's a lot of assumptions about you. Surviving as an adult isn't easy - there's unspoken rules and skills that you need to have. Social interaction and high tolerance to rejection is one of them.
Contrary to popular beliefs, no one pities the mentally disadvantaged. You're a "weirdo" and "slow-thinker" in real life, you experience whispers and eyes peering at you, your weird way of walking and slouching is being laughed at. If you show your weakness, you're fucked up.
Schools are fucking stupid, they don't prepare you for adult life. I don't know how to do taxes, banking or any of that. I'm not even sure how to get assets of my deceased parents, in case of an unforeseen tragedy. Dad has also lent and borrowed soft loan (no interest) to others, there's no legal contract, it's all based on word-of-mouth and trust, and I don't even know I should be asking from, or giving money to.
I paid a lot for 4 years of degree. Education is expensive, obviously. I thought that getting a degree = automatic job safety. Turns out it was all bullshit. It's a cash-grab scheme.
Nothing they teach you in university matters, it's all outdated bullshit and niche stuff, you're not going to work on that, tier-1 college students will gain access to them. Real, accessible job is shitty, low-paying, replaceable and repetitive.
My parents went to a relative gathering for the first time. People kept asking them about jobs, and they blurted that I work at GitHub. He lied, because he was ashamed. I've simply participated in a stupid hackathon by GitHub, that's it. Never got a proper job after graduation. I felt like I was stripped naked and hanging onto a pole, with my limbs tied for everyone to see.
The recession is so bad, they're demanding that graduates pay their employer for internship. Haha, what a fucking joke, right? Check these stories out (Reddit link btw) 1 2.
Removing this one for privacy
Nothing to save, everything to slave. There's too many of us. Being a cog in a machinery is one thing, but being a spare cog made in excess hits different. The machinery demands that I am not needed.
Pretty lucky. Let go from a bad job that had downsizing. Got a better job. Moved in with my partner. She loves my kitties. Very fortunate and grateful. Itβs been very bad, so this is something Iβd never expected.
As the saying goes, there will be ups and there will be downs. Remember that it will go back up, even when it seems like it will only be down. Itβs hard to do, but please try.
Huge opportunities are happening in my career but the stress of getting to that point and moving all the way across the country for it is about to fucking do me in. Coping with it but the cracks are starting to show. Thank God for my wife. She is all the support I will ever need but I'm worried she's going to crack sooner or later as well.
Fucked up
Not great. Living with fibromyalgia and today is a bad day. No energy and my neck/head and legs are really painful.
Not doing good.
How are you?
Right now, thoroughly annoyed. Which is a lot better than a lot of ways one could feel.