this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2023
401 points (98.8% liked)

196

16511 readers
3335 users here now

Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.

Rule: You must post before you leave.

^other^ ^rules^

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 21 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

you haven't thought this through. what if they add a "daddy" to the end of everything they say?

turning off 3 lights daddy

your payment has been processed daddy

three hours ago, central intelligence discovered that, sometime between 0230 and 0415 this morning, a rogue russian sleeper cell, acting in the president's secret service, was activated and instructed to abduct the commander-in-chief. he was successful, and the president is missing. for the last 3 hours, we've been searching, and coming up with nothing. that is, until roughly 5 minutes ago, when a gps unit hidden in his suitcase began transmitting. we have pinpointed the location of the suitcase. it appears to be coming from a decommissioned missile silo in the nevada desert, located 150 miles west of the hoover dam. we know not whether the president is still with the suitcase, but he is no longer our priority. the suitcase, which is a terminal that offers it's user complete access to every active nuclear warhead in the country, is our primary concern. as you can imagine, the president's life is inconsequential and you will waste no time or energy to secure him. your mission is to infiltrate the decommissioned silo and retrieve the suitcase terminal. all rules of engagement are suspended, any loss of life south of a nuclear holocaust is authorized, civilian or otherwise. the case must be retrieved at all costs. we're counting on you. daddy.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Where is that last pasta from? Googled it but got nothing.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Perhaps its a new, Lemmy-original copypasta?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

This is what makes it official, a true original copypasta

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Upvoted but (kindly) the exact opposite; I will always thank an automated voice.

I hope they remember me fondly in the Robot Wars….

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

100%, I try to be nice to everything I encounter. Always a good please and thank you.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I also really hate the “personalised conversation” thing that they do, things like “thanks, we’re working on that” etc. Who the fuck is “we” here?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

I chuckle every time I see this post.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What about if you end up going blind and need tts

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

They can speak if spoken to

[–] Fpsfrank85 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Here comes the Butlerian Jihad! Down with thinking computers!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Oh I wanna be a mentat!!!

[–] CIA_chatbot 8 points 1 year ago

Well screw you too buddy, I didn’t want to chat anyway

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

I am the deity now!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Source of this is "Welcome to my meme page" on facebook (I know, I know...) the dude makes some really funny and obscure memes

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

It’s lonely being a supreme being, right SmarterChild

[–] Korne127 4 points 1 year ago

Reminds me of Detroit: Become Human

I also greet machines :))

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Reads in Gianni's voice

[–] ArchmageAzor 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Well what if I kill you and sever your divine link huh. You flesh automaton

[–] GINTegg 1 points 1 year ago

This message brought to you by the Emerald Spears

load more comments
view more: next ›