this post was submitted on 11 May 2024
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I was too, but most of the people that call themselves "femcels" nowadays aren't actually the female version of incels. There have been communities of unironic female incels, like the subreddit FemaleDatingStrategy, and while some of them were just men trying to agitate, a lot were women.
They talked a lot about finding "high value males," using very dehumanizing language that reinforces what they see as "objective" sexual roles. They were obviously transphobic and misogynistic, viewing relationships from a purely mechanical perspective. Emotional attachment didn't matter and was a hindrance to fulfilling their "biological purpose." 🙄
People get drawn to these ideas because they're trying to find meaning. They want some objective authority to tell them what to do with their life, so they look to the our rudimentary understanding of evolutionary psychology and assume that it's some perfect model for how to live. They don't understand that not only is the science warped by a shitty culture, but nature isn't even a good model for how to live a fulfilling life. Nature doesn't care for our best interests, it's just a soulless machine.
The femcel community here is a celebration of queerness, self depreciation at our "weaknesses." Actual femcels want to conform, we don't. We be silly, we be free :3
Many years ago, I called out people at some subreddit for immediately associating someone not being able to find a partner with being a terrible person, almost like they inherently had little value as a human being and deserved to be alone, etc. I initially got a lot of support, until a couple of people started to attack my comments in that thread viciously, making shit up, bringing assumptions out of nowhere, and the both of them were usual posters of r/FemaleDatingStrategy. I gave a look to c/femcelmemes a couple of weeks ago, and the vibes were NOTHING ALIKE. Internet just generally sucks at naming things.