this post was submitted on 14 Feb 2024
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Is own a grenade launcher for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four heathans break into me house. "Have at 'em lads" As I grab me scrumpeh and grenade launcher. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Quikie laucher on the second man, miss im entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the enemy spy. I have to resort to the loose canon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with cannonball, "Not one of yas going to survive this!" the double donk gibs two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Grab me bottle o' scrumpeh and charge the last terrified dadie prancin' with a head full of eyeballs. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular glass wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Cue the "kaboom" taunt
Your ASS is GRASS and I'm the GRASSman... drunken rambling