this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2024
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I know that it has significant meaning to me but I struggle putting it into words to explain it to other people (especially other dya cis people). So like a few years ago I was thinking about if I may be trans femme. I have since realised that no, actually I was just struggling with it for a while because I don't relate to the gender roles and expectations society puts on men. I now identify more strongly with being a man than ever before, and I love being a man in a gender-way. I just absolutely hate being a man in a "what role men have in society"-way.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Humans are like computers, we have a biological hardware and a biological software. Gender is the software. Sometimes the software does not reflect the hardware. One (very rough) analogy I give for this is to suppose you have a Mac and someone installed Windows 10 on it. Yes, it's true that, on the outside, it's a Mac, but for all intents and purposes, it's a Windows 10 now. And in the long run, it shall be respected.

[–] polysexualstick 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Nah, I don't subscribe to that analogy because it still implies that there are "male" bodies and "female" bodies when I think every woman's body is by definition a female body and every man's body is by definition a male body.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

How does what I say imply that? All I said was that gender and sex were different.

[–] polysexualstick 3 points 9 months ago (2 children)

You said:

Sometimes the software does not reflect the hardware.

If gender is the software and the body is the hardware, this is kind of the "born in the wrong body"-stuff many people still use and it implies that there is a kind of hardware/software combination that fits together and a kind of combination that does not.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

I see where you're coming from, but there kinda is, as anyone who has experienced gender dysphoria can tell you.

HRT really does alter biological sex in a meaningful way, and I think a lot of people view medical transition as making the body fit the mind better.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Or I was implying what the prefix "trans" implies. You can't be "trans" if there's no "base". I wasn't saying any were "superior".

[–] Maven 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Humans are very much NOT binary when it comes to hardware. Intersex is a lot more common than people think though often in ways that aren't exactly visible. I know 3 intersex people personally that are all intersex in different ways.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You say that like I was implying that.

[–] Maven 7 points 9 months ago

You're right. I reread and you didn't state the binary aspect. That was an assumption on my end due to previous times I'd heard a similar argument comparing humans and computers on this topic. I apologize for misreading and misunderstanding your point.

[–] Cryophilia 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Please find a hobby that has nothing to do with computers.

I just...it bothers me when people insist on describing literally everything as some sort of metaphor to tech. Like...that's not healthy.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You interpreted all that simply from my choice of analogy?

[–] Cryophilia 1 points 9 months ago