this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2023
68 points (87.0% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26752 readers
1454 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Regale us with tales of awful exes, terrible siblings, toxic Co workers and other nefarious characters you've encountered along the way in this journey we call life.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Contramuffin 37 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I was in MathCounts in middle school. MathCounts is a competitive math club for middle schoolers. Think of it as just taking the SAT for fun.

The club advisor was a woman that we'll call Ms. Audrey. She isn't actually a teacher, and really her position in the school is sort of a gray area. All we really know is that she's been with the school since its inception, and she holds a lot of influence over the school's admins. It may be because the school admins view MathCounts performance as good marketing to show that the school is doing well academically, but that's just my speculation.

In any case, her life is math. That's basically all she does. She even has a husband with a doctorate in math. Actually, she would have been the most valid candidate to be the club advisor, if not for the fact that she was extremely harsh and abusive toward the club members. If a club member gets a question wrong during practice tests, then she would single them out and have them stand in front of the room, and force the member to try to solve that question correctly while yelling at him that he should have solved it correctly the first time. Of course, a student doesn't willingly get questions wrong, so when this happens, the student has no idea how to solve the question the correct way and the entire club ends up wasting a good 10 minutes watching that one student try to solve the question through trial and error. It's terrible for the student and it's terrible to everyone else watching.

To make up for the inefficient use of time, Ms. Audrey mandates that club members need to spend 3-4 hours after school on the club, Monday through Friday. Essentially, we finish school at 6pm earliest, and we regularly go past 7pm and sometimes into 8pm. She also hosts additional "optional" practice sessions on the weekends and over the holidays. Also, she assigns practice tests as homework.

She once kept our competition awards hostage. When asked about it, she just said that she needed it for something and that she'll give it to us "later." I later secretly went in to the room and took my award anyways.

Once, she lost one of her binders. I'm not sure what was in it, and frankly, I don't care to wonder. But she seemed to have thought that it was really important, because she launched an entire "investigation" into who took the binder.

Her idea of an investigation is to wait until a club member is alone, then ask that club member to sit in the teacher's lounge. She would then "leave" to do something else and let the student sit for 10 minutes. When she returned, her entire demeanor was different, and she would insist that the student "confess for what they did." She would say that other club members saw that student do it and that she already knows that the student did it, but she just needed the student to say it. She would threaten severe consequences unless the student confess. And she would pressure the student until they start crying. If still the student didn't say anything, she would conclude that the student was innocent and didn't take her binder. Repeat for the other club members until she found someone who confessed. Of course, it turns out that nobody took her binder.

I think none of the club members knew any better, and so none of them left. A lot of members were also pressured by their families into staying because "Ms. Audrey is overqualified and she gets results."

I'm not quite sure what it is about me, but when I joined, Ms. Audrey kind of fixated on me. She somehow came to the conclusion that I had "enormous untapped potential for math," and she made it her job to try to activate that untapped potential. To be entirely fair to her, I was good at math. I was a quick learner and I was able to solve some of the problems that other people couldn't solve. But I think she vastly overestimated my potential, or at least she was terrible at activating my potential. And very quickly I became a major target of a lot of her abuse, when I wasn't living up to her ideas on my mathematical abilities. I ended up hating math as a subject, and when I finally got to high school, I had an entire career plan shift. Now I'm a biologist, where I don't need to touch math at all.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

That's messed up that a teacher can abuse a child to the point where they kill their interest in a subject.

[–] STRIKINGdebate2 8 points 1 year ago

From reading this story I get the vibe that miss Audrey had very little going on in her life apart from this maths club. Its ironic that because of her inability to rein in her passion for maths she likely turned you and many others off the subject.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Wow. I don’t say this often, but Miss Audrey sounds like a complete bitch.
Sorry you had to go through such an experience. Do you still hate math?

[–] Contramuffin 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah. I can't imagine myself doing any sort of math beyond basic units conversion for my work. The entire experience just put me off math completely

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That’s awful.. I hope that at least you still enjoy what you’re doing now?
Did she ever receive any comeuppance?

[–] Contramuffin 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

No, nothing happened to her. She left the school the year that I graduated from middle school, so she's no longer traumatizing children in my middle school anymore at least. That being said, I'm not sure if she moved to another school or not

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Too bad..
Again, sorry you had to go through all of this. Thank you for sharing your story.

[–] NOT_RICK 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

This story kind of reminds me of the movie Whiplash

[–] Contramuffin 3 points 1 year ago

I haven't heard of the movie before, but briefly looking over the synopsis, yeah, it was pretty similar to what my experience was like. It feels like kind of a shame, because I feel like I might have actually done pretty well and learned a lot if the advisor was more supportive. I don't particularly regret it though, since I'm pretty satisfied with my current career path, and I feel like I wouldn't be where I am now if not for going through that experience.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Except with a less destructive ending