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People who lost a parent they truly disliked but were still in contact with, how did you feel? (self.asklemmy)

submitted 1 week ago by MTK to c/asklemmy

24 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Well, I have a parent that is right on the edge of dislike that I keep them in my life for the sake of family harmony. But I consider them to be a bad person that makes me extremely uncomfortable to be around.

If you had something similar, and they died, how did it make you feel?

I'm purely curious because right now I feel like I would happy that they are out of my life, but sad for my family, but overall happier. And I want to understand if I'm being naive about the hardship of losing a parent, even a disliked one.

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[–] dingus 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I have a parent who is still living, but that I don't have the best relationship with. He was an abusive husband, but I still see him occasionally and speak to him over the phone. Currently, he lives across the country and likes to talk about moving close to me when he retires within the next couple of years or so. It sounds bad to say, but I kind of hope he dies before that happens instead.

My mom is a wonderful person, and it always makes me feel some type of way with interacting so much with the person that harmed her for so many years.

Many years back when I was in my late teens, my dad threatened to kill himself over finding out my mom had evidently been cheating on him. I honestly thought it was hilarious and I just went to college as normal that morning, not caring whether or not he was actually going to kill himself. I wasn't sure if I'd come back and he would be dead, but I didn't really care at the time.

I don't know if it makes me a bad person, and I guess I don't know for sure that I would feel relieved if he died. But I think I probably would.

[–] MTK 3 points 1 week ago

I don't think it makes you a bad person