this post was submitted on 16 Feb 2025
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Showerthoughts

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A "Showerthought" is a simple term used to describe the thoughts that pop into your head while you're doing everyday things like taking a shower, driving, or just daydreaming. The most popular seem to be lighthearted, clever little truths, hidden in daily life.

Here are some examples to inspire your own showerthoughts: 1

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  1. All posts must be showerthoughts
  2. The entire showerthought must be in the title
  3. No politics
    • If your topic is in a grey area, please phrase it to emphasize the fascinating aspects, not the dramatic aspects. You can do this by avoiding overly politicized terms such as "capitalism" and "communism". If you must make comparisons, you can say something is different without saying something is better/worse.
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[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Entirely too many people give a shit about a shitass collection of bronze age bullshit in the first place.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago

I don't know who you are, where you live, or what you do for work, but if you talk crap about the quality copper ingots of Ea-nāṣir, I'm gonna whip your ass. That stuff is dope!

Or is there something else to say about that time?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Iron Age*

Get your ages straight

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[–] [email protected] 76 points 3 days ago

I don't care if he was purple, his message was be kind to each other and we've failed to grasp even that simple philosophy.

[–] wabafee 19 points 2 days ago (4 children)

In todays standard Jesus would be a communist.

[–] lepinkainen 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

ICE would say “Papers, please” to him

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I think "Gotcha, filthy Mexican!" would be more likely

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Really more of a communal theocracy. It says right in the New Testament that you are expected to give all of your wealth to the church, with the implicit trust that the church is meant to distribute those resources fairly, starting with those most in need.

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[–] nexguy 8 points 2 days ago (5 children)

I like my sky wizards to be of authentic skin color thank you very much.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Considering the makeup of the population of the region back when Jesus lived, he could have had white skin due to the Roman, Greek and Anatolian (modern Turkey) presences, though light hair would be super unlikely. Of course, the most likely appearance would've been that of a common Egyptian, almond-ish skin, #D5915A, and black hair

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (14 children)

If he actually lived it might even matter.

[–] NocturnalMorning 32 points 3 days ago (6 children)

There are historical records of somebody named Jesus that lived at the time. The Bible story is just horse shit. He was an apocalyptic preacher just like today, and probably had undiagnosed schizophrenia, thought he could talk to God, and was the son of God. Plenty of people think that today, and we put them in Institutions instead of create a whole ass religion out of their life.

[–] NOT_RICK 56 points 3 days ago (18 children)

I will say this, I can’t think of a thing Jesus says in the Bible that isn’t pretty based. He prioritized pragmatism over rules and protocol, compassion and understanding over judgment, generosity over greed, forgiveness over scorn, acts over words. Everyone following his death like Paul seem to be the ones that start to miss the point.

[–] disguy_ovahea 24 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The desire to control people who follow compassionate teachings is what turned sound advice into the dogma we see today. It’s an unfortunate history, not unique to Christianity.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's the institutionalisation of religion that's a problem.
If everyone would just focus on finding their own connection with god/the universe/whatever, nobody would have a problem.

Fuck churches and using religion for politics.
That's why we have the separation of church and state at least - although not enough and currently it's backpedaling...

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[–] Lightor 8 points 2 days ago (7 children)

Umm there's a few

When he spoke of division instead of peace (Matthew 10:34-36, Luke 12:51-53)

"Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword."

Acting like a gate keeper of Salvation (John 14:6)

"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

Slavery and servanthood (Luke 12:47-48)

"The servant who knows the master’s will and does not get ready or does not do what the master wants will be beaten with many blows."

Gentiles as ‘Dogs’ (Matthew 15:21-28)

When a Canaanite woman asks for help, Jesus initially replies: "It is not right to take the children's bread and toss it to the dogs."

There's a few more, but I'm too lazy to keep going. The problem with the bible is it tried to be too many things at once. Especially trying to sell the concept of fear and love in one, which isn't possible.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

He never claimed to be the literal son of God, this is something that was addded into the dogma 2 to 3 centuries after his death during the Council of Nicaea (check Arianism).

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Knew a theology professor (ended up in his class for credits somehow) who went with the "multiple Jesus's" theory. Apparently it's quite possible that stories of a variety of healers/figures got combined into the Jesus mythos. Explains a lot of the time and geographical inconsistencies with the historical record iirc

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[–] yesman 23 points 3 days ago

The best argument for Jesus' existence comes from Christopher Hitchens.

It goes like this: We know the nativity story is made up because of the census. There was a census near the time, but it was after Harrod's death and cannot fit the story. But why fabricate the nativity? Probably because Jesus of Nazareth is supposed to be born in the "city of David": Bethlehem. So then, if Jesus was invented whole cloth, why not make him Jesus of Bethlehem and save the aggravation?

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[–] DeadNinja 4 points 2 days ago (3 children)

The first person of color to be killed by the police.

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[–] FlyingSquid 10 points 2 days ago (3 children)

People also think that Jesus was all love and light and goodness because they ignore or don't know about the other parts about Jesus.

Like when he says, just two verses after the famous John 3:16 verse, that you worship him or go to hell:

18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son

Then there's him being super racist:

21 Leaving that place, Jesus withdrew to the region of Tyre and Sidon. 22 A Canaanite woman from that vicinity came to him, crying out, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on me! My daughter is demon-possessed and suffering terribly.”

23 Jesus did not answer a word. So his disciples came to him and urged him, “Send her away, for she keeps crying out after us.”

24 He answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of Israel.”

25 The woman came and knelt before him. “Lord, help me!” she said.

26 He replied, “It is not right to take the children’s bread and toss it to the dogs.”

Mark 15:21-28

Or when he says in Matthew 19 that you can only divorce a woman (and, of course, a woman can't divorce a man) if she's cheating on you, essentially condoning domestic violence:

8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

There's more where that came from.

I'm sure some Christian would be happy to come in here and hand wave it all away with being out of context or misinterpreted or whatever. And yet quoting the Bible out of context happens every time they go to their church and they have no issues.

People most often praise Jesus for the Golden Rule. He didn't invent it.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_Rule#Ancient_Egypt

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Oof. Where do I begin? You actually incorrectly cited the source of the verse you are quoting, so we’re off to a great start.

First off, you’ve incorrectly cited the verse to Mark 15:21-28 which is about Jesus’ crucifixion instead of Matthew 15:21-28 which you also sneakily removed the last two verse (27, 28) which are necessary to understand the context.

27 “Yes it is, Lord,” she said. “Even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their master’s table.”

28 Then Jesus said to her, “Woman, you have great faith! Your request is granted.” And her daughter was healed at that moment.

Also, Jesus alludes to his Parable of The Lost Sheep (Matthew 18:10-14, Luke 15:3-7) when he said, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of Israel”. In this context, the Canaanite woman in Matthew 15 is just one of many lost sheep.

In regards to marital divorce in Matthew 19; yea, this one is pretty easy if we take into consideration that social customs have been continuously evolving. The first verse in Matthew 18 begins with Pharisees attempting to catch Jesus in an ideological “gotcha”.

“Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”

Jesus responds by saying, “…they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Keep in mind, when the Israelites were autonomous from foreign rule, they imposed the death penalty to those who committed adultery. It wasn’t until Moses that the concept of a divorce certificate was created, eliminating death to adulterers, which was a socially progressive move for that ancient time period. After all, you can’t create the act of divorce without first creating the act of marriage. I’ll continue with Matthew 19:7:

“Why then,” the Pharisees asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.”

The hearts of the people during Moses’ time had become hardened, cold, unsympathetic to those who committed adultery and sentenced them to death. The certificate of divorce that Moses proposed allowed for the hearts of people to soften instead of, you know, killing in the name of law.

So, when the Pharisees present this question to Jesus, he doesn’t actually say anything about whether women can or cannot divorce their husband, as you seem to imply. Jesus simply explains the history of the Pharisees’ own religious law back to them. They wanted him to take a definitive side so they could have him arrested for heresy and he didn’t take that bait.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

So Jesus called gentiles dogs and only healed the daughter after her mother crawled in the dust? Not very loving, which is what OP pointed out. The two added verses don't change that.

Also, he admits here that he is there for the lost Sheep of Israel.

I always find it funny how Christians rally around a guy who called them dogs and made it clear he doesn't care about them, just because a random dude (Paul) had "visions" of Jesus 30 years after his death and from there on pretended that gentiles were part of the ingoup. While contradicting Jesus as well if the church of Jesus actual fucking brother on this very issue.

It's just wild.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

The bible contradicts itself a few times. I think ultimately faith is faith based. (shocking I know)

[–] Valmond 4 points 2 days ago (6 children)

The golden rule is so stupid too, I want to be left alone, should I leave people alone? My friend likes people coming to his place unannounced, should he come to places unanounced?

It's like everyone takes the rule and twists it so it benefits/excuses how they live and do.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (5 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, I think Italian Renaissance painters may have pre-dated that somewhat.

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[–] FlyingSquid 10 points 2 days ago

That's a ridiculous claim.

Here's a picture of Jesus' baptism from Normandy, painted in 1185.

Plenty of others here: https://smarthistory.org/standard-scenes-from-the-life-of-christ-in-art/

Europeans tended to paint Jesus as white because they didn't understand there were no photos or movies or TV around, so someone in Norman France didn't know there was an alternative possibility.

[–] Gold_E_Lox 11 points 2 days ago (1 children)

i think it goes back a little further than some dude from the US...

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago (5 children)

After reading that I just had an idea for what I think would be a good premise for a film. In the 70s Jesus "returns" in the US somewhere, but as someone who gets labelled as a black man, noone believes him. Because he keeps getting knocked down at every turn due to systemic racism, and because he is so fed-up with the "White Jesus" trope he joins the Black Panther Party. He ends up being shot by a cop. Final shot slow-zooms in to show cop's name on a tag. First name Judas.

[–] MothmanDelorian 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Do you think Ancient Jewish people were black? Have you ever met anyone who lives around the Mediterranean? He would look like a version of that guy who worked outdoors. He was from the Levant not sub-Saharan Africa. He wouldn't be "black" rather he would be seen as Middle Eastern.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago
[–] Saltycracker 3 points 2 days ago

According to the usa census it you are from the Middle East you have to put caucasian. My family on my dads side came from Syria

[–] Hikermick 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

When you picture God what skin color do you see? What gender do you see?

[–] RadioFreeArabia 3 points 2 days ago

Modern day Palestinians come in all shades from "white" to "black". As someone who studied and argued the genealogy and ancestry of the region, here's the gist of it:

  1. Ancient Egyptians and Ancient Levantines are closely related.
  2. The closest people to Ancinet Egyptians are modern day Egyptians.
  3. The closest people to Ancient Levantines are modern day Yemenis, then Saudis.
  4. Modern Levantines reflect millennia of migrations and conquests since the collapse of the Bronze Age.
[–] biofaust 4 points 2 days ago

Very nice episode about this came out lately on the 99% Invisible podcast. Here's the link: https://99percentinvisible.org/episode/615-your-own-personal-jesus/

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago

Far too many people only think they're following Jesus.

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