this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2024
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United States | News & Politics

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[–] [email protected] 79 points 2 months ago

As soon as they announced that "antifa is a terrorist organization" I then knew exactly what they were up to. So the narrative was "fascism is good, and your a threat if you try to stop it".

[–] [email protected] 64 points 2 months ago (5 children)

I've been waiting for the ideal time to unmask myself, and now seems as good a time as any.

It is I. I am the president and CEO of Antifa, and I rule with an iron fist.

I'll take your questions now.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago (2 children)

If you're antipho, what's your soup of choice?

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago

That's a joke for radio. NEXT!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If they're antipho we can safely assume their opinions on soup aren't worth a damn.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Gazpacho, like revenge, is best served cold.

[–] bibliotectress 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Hi! Yes, I have a question.

Grocery prices have been hitting hard lately, and I'm looking into alternative meat sources. I would like to know if I were to join your company, could we literally eat the rich? Or, second best, take all their stuff?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

God knows what wierd chemicals they are marinating in, and most of them are busy amassing private armies and creating microstates while working to erode the checks that currently limit their ability to essentially act as actual sovereign citizen, so it wouldn't exactly be very calorically rewarding compared to the effort, but...

NEXT!

[–] Avatar_of_Self 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I've heard rumors of unionizing at antifa. What is your strategy for dealing with that?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Obvious conservative plant question. Collective action itself is the iron fist with which I rule, thus a Union would be redundant.

NEXT!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

What's your company culture like? What are the perks of working for antifa?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Same answer to both questions: fash bashin'

NEXT!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

So no 401k or dental than? No thanks.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

Not OP, but I'll field this part. Where we're going 401Ks and dental won't be needed.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Are you hiring ?

[–] bazus1 56 points 2 months ago (2 children)

[security contractors joined by officers hailing from across the federal government] converged for a mission dubbed “Operation Diligent Valor,” authorized under Executive Order 13933, purportedly to apprehend “anarchists and left-wing extremists” who’d been driven by Floyd’s murder to target U.S. monuments commemorating slave owners and Confederate traitors — dangerous individuals, Trump said, advancing a “fringe ideology” painting the U.S. government as “fundamentally unjust.”

Irony is dead.

[–] PriorityMotif 19 points 2 months ago (2 children)

My p-doc is from Vietnam and went on an unsolicited rant on how you should never trust the government. Trump is literally the inverse of sanity.

[–] Bonesince1997 5 points 2 months ago

And yet he takes many many people with him. Trump, not your doc.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

At this point, the people who like him aren’t looking for sanity. They’re looking for their daily Two Minutes Hate.

[–] Jarix 2 points 2 months ago

...that actually makes a disturbing amount of sense. a very disturbing amount of sense.

I'm gonna go smoke a joint

[–] lectricleopard 11 points 2 months ago

That's just double speak at this point. We've always been at war with easteasia.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Every article that says the word "anarchist" should go out of their way to say that its not illegal to be a capitalist, a communist, or an anarchist. Its a legitimate political ideology thats been around for centuries.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Corporate media are never going to consider socialism legitimate any more than Homeland Security will, because it goes against capitalist class’ interests.

[–] Hackerman_uwu -1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Actually of all the “others” or “out groups” that exist, anarchists are the ones I cannot fucking take.

Irony begin that I’m more aligned to their politics that I am to any of the others, I’ve just never met one that I like. Meta irony being that that is probably the most anarchic position to hold on other anarchists but I wouldn’t out money on that.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

That's strange. I've never met an anarchist that I didn't like. They're usually the kindest and most selfless people.

Maybe try going to a mutual aid action, like Food Not Bombs?

[–] Voyajer 26 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] UnderpantsWeevil 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] AbidanYre 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Jon_Servo 24 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Couldn't even pull off a Reichstag fire.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

I mean, if they were going to try and burn down the Capitol Building, clearly the right people to have blamed would be us Canadians. We do have a bit of history doing just that. 😏

[–] AtomicHotSauce 15 points 2 months ago

Definitely not surprised anymore.

[–] Linkerbaan 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Trump to CIA: I need you to stage a false flag terror attack

CIA: Sure thing boss which country

Trump: no within America

[–] IMongoose 4 points 2 months ago

Wait, so is Mexican Joker not real? I was sure that was real. It sounded so real!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Possibly a few real ones, too!