this post was submitted on 18 Jun 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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So awkward, but come on it says right there on the package to wash those mushrooms or whatever it is… You’re not their mom but you don’t wanna eat feces or whatever ended up on the produce. A quick rinse is never going to be perfect but it’s better than nothing.

In the absence of legitimate suggestions, commiseration is welcome too 😉

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[–] Crampon 2 points 4 days ago

"I've had sand on my vegetables before. Can I wash them?"

I've found sand in salad multiple times. Not washing greens are weird.

[–] spittingimage 101 points 1 week ago (3 children)

"Do you mind if I wash these? I'm allergic to pesticides, even in trace amounts."

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 days ago

Just offer to wash the vegetables, who says no to that?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 week ago

No need to fabricate some lie, as that might backfire at some point.

"Hey I would be more comfortable if the vegetables were washed. Do you mind if I wash them?"

Or just offer to help and start washing them.

The important thing is to not make it about them, but about you. Most people don't get offended when you make it all about yourself, and not them doing something wrong.

[–] Lemming6969 7 points 1 week ago

"Then you're going to have a bad time, because they are on the inside too and your quick rinse only probably gets rid of half on the outside."

[–] robolemmy 68 points 1 week ago (15 children)

There are a lot of people who think, largely due to misinformed cooking shows, that you shouldn't wash mushrooms, just wipe them off.

If you want them washed, maybe say "Hey, I can help out by washing those for you."

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 week ago

As far as I've found, they're both right. You shouldn't have to wash your mushrooms, but it's not a bad idea if you're not buying fancy mushrooms.

The generic button mushroom variants you're probably getting at the grocery store are grown in compost, which often contains some manure - ie poops.

But before growing mushrooms it's pasteurized. Mycelium is picky, and fairly easily out-competed by other stuff, so to make sure you're just growing mushrooms and not bacteria you basically have to sterilize the medium they're grown in.

But those mushrooms are often grown in open beds, and harvested by hand. And that means they get that poop dirt right up on them. Will it immediately give you super botulism? Probably not but it's still kinda ick.

Fancier mushroom varieties from smaller cultivars are the ones that actually don't really need washed and often shouldn't be. They're grown in highly sterile environments and they fruit out of a container, so they never touched the poop. And that's if they even used compost - lots use straw or wood.

If you do decide to wash your button mushrooms it's not a big deal, they aren't actually sponges, and they don't absorb as much water as some cooking shows say. If they get soggy it probably means they're old, try putting them in the fridge for a few hours uncovered. It's basically a dehydrator.

[–] Crackhappy 18 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Not only should you wash them, you should also start a sautee with a couple tablespoons of water, then add fats later.

[–] mkwt 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If you add the fat first, the mushrooms are going to release so much liquid that you just have to boil that off anyway.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I sweat the mushrooms in the microwave before I sauté. They release a ton of water, which I use on another dish's preparation (rice, pasta, kale, etc).

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Did the information upthread ruin that method for you? Hopefully that water isn’t all pesticidey and poopy… (I have no insight on that)

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[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart 66 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Stick a carrot up your ass and put it back in the bunch.

[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] redbr64 3 points 1 week ago

😂 I don't pay that much attention to usernames, but once I saw your comment, I was like "hey, I think I have come across SatansMaggotyCumFart a few times before!"

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago

Username checks out

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's okay to be direct a little bit.

"You don't wash the mushrooms? It says on the package, man, they might have poop or pesticide or whatever else."

"Okay, well if I'm gonna be eating them can I wash them? I'll make 'em up, man, I'm not telling you what to do. But I don't wanna eat anything that's on them that might be bad for me. I would prefer not to at least."

I don't know, you can adapt the language, or stay away from the whole conversation if it really feels wrong. But usually if there's an issue it's better to say what the issue is even if it's a little uncomfortable. You're not making a problem or starting a confrontation, it's just saying what's on your mind and sharing. Otherwise you don't really have friends and allies, just sort of alien people you're going through the motions with while you each harbor your own little secret thoughts all through the evening.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 week ago

“You don’t wash the mushrooms? It says on the package, man, they might have poop or pesticide or whatever else.”

When we make something about the other person, telling them that they are wrong and, in this case, even disgusting, they are going to get offended and be less amendable to seeing your side and helping you out. They may get shamed into doing it, but I think this damages the relationship.

Just make it about yourself

"Hey, Im a bit squeamish about unwashed veggies. Do you mind if I rinse them for you?"

Gets the same point across, but makes it about yourself rather than the other person, so they have no reason to be defensive. They will also be more likely to open up to changing.

[–] Mojave 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)

"Hey, wash those veggies first"

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 week ago

Don't even ask, just start washing them yourself. Lol

[–] Boozilla 20 points 1 week ago (1 children)

"Did you know that garden gnomes have passionate all-night orgies?"

[–] Crackhappy 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

They have a lemon party under the lemon tree.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago (4 children)

What’s a lemon party? Should I Google it with safe search off?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

No, Google is all AI disinformation now, better just go directly to the website itself.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Crackhappy 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Holy shit. Haha that's a blast from the past.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

'connection refused'

But... I wanted to party... With some lemons...

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago

"hey, sorry to seem rude, but I am a little neurotic about this, I recently got sick from eating some unwashed vegetables so now I'm trying to be hyper vigilant, can I wash these really quickly?"

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Probably the only way is to help prepare with them or talk to them about it.

I gave a friend of mine a hard time for not rinsing off the soap before putting them out to dry.

Edit: Their dishes, not their food.

[–] I_Fart_Glitter 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

They wash their vegetables with soap? Like.. special veg soap or just like Dawn or something?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oh my, I missed a word there. I meant to say they were doing that with their dishes. haha

[–] I_Fart_Glitter 5 points 1 week ago

Oh good. That makes more sense.

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[–] grasshopper_mouse 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This is a tricky one. I think I'd just offer to help them prepare and then specifically ask to be put on vegetable duty. One of my aunts is like this, doesn't wash veggies, doesn't rinse the soap off her dishes once she's scrubbed them (!), so whenever I'm at her house I just offer to help.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

doesn't rinse the soap off her dishes once she's scrubbed them

She European?

Flabbergasted when I learned from an American friend that their British friend did this.

[–] grasshopper_mouse 10 points 1 week ago

No she's not. The water is very unclean, super soapy, and she does it "to save water". There is often soap residue on the glasses and probably the dishes too, you can just see it easier on the glass. She wonders why she's had stomach issues most of her adult life.

This is also the woman who once let a turkey thaw in her fridge, which then leaked raw turkey juice (bloody water) onto a half slice of watermelon that was on the shelf below it. She then ate the watermelon after washing it off in the sink "because it was wrapped in plastic and was still ok." It was not ok, she got food poisoning.

I think she's just unhygienic and has an "I'm always right" Boomer mentality.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Throw up on their vegetables. That wont come as rude, and certainly you wont have the problem of eating with them again in the future

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