this post was submitted on 17 Apr 2024
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[–] [email protected] 85 points 10 months ago (1 children)

If life gives you lemons, make a scaleable operation.

[–] HootinNHollerin 27 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

Funnily enough life didn’t give us lemons. we made them

[–] Caboose12000 11 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)
[–] surewhynotlem 7 points 10 months ago

Well that was epic for no reason

[–] Blyfh 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] HootinNHollerin 2 points 10 months ago
[–] IzzyJ 59 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

Alright I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade- make life take the lemons back. Get mad. I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons, do you know who I am? I'm the man who's going to burn your house down...with the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

[–] Meowie_Gamer 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

He says what everyone's thinking!

[–] BluesF 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

CAN IT! When God gives you lemons you FIND A NEW GOD!

[–] Apollo42 2 points 10 months ago

BEAR BLASTING! Similar to hump-catting.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago

Better safe than sorry.

[–] jordanlund 34 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Somebody needs to make life take those lemons back!

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I propose some variety of arson… with the lemons.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)

When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Cave Johnson

[–] samus12345 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago

Dad, are we really trying to create combustible lemons?

Yes, we arson!

[–] [email protected] 29 points 10 months ago (2 children)

As if life would just give you lemons.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

Sometimes it does. Problem is, no one wants to buy lemonade.

[–] AngryCommieKender 6 points 10 months ago (2 children)

We have lemon trees for that

[–] RGB3x3 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

But who wants to be a lemon-stealing whore?

[–] AngryCommieKender 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

I'm not stealing them, if I don't pick them, they fall off and rot doing no good for the tree, thereby completely wasting all the energy the tree spent on making the things. There aren't a lot of marsupials or rodents that have the right type of hands/paws for meaningfully harvesting and spreading of the seeds in my neck of the desert to take care of seed distribution for the tree naturally.

Yes, I am growing lemons, avocados, limes, peaches, bananas, and figs currently in a desert with only collected rainwater, and grey water from my washing machine. There's no city water involved. It doesn't rain very often outside of the "cool autumn" season for about four months of the year, the other 8 months are "warm spring" we don't really get rain then, which is why I have 3400 gallons of rainwater storage that gets refilled in the first or second rain of the season.

[–] RGB3x3 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] AngryCommieKender 2 points 10 months ago

Ahh, I've not run into that one before

[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot 6 points 10 months ago

Best I can do is turnip juice.

[–] Anamnesis 16 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Me after working every day for four months straight. 😑

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] Anamnesis 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Yeah I work four part time jobs. I'm working every single day. It is a real bummer.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Sorry to hear that. I hope it gets better for you soon ❤️

[–] Anamnesis 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Just a few more months and I'll only have one and all my debt will be paid off. There's light at the end of the tunnel!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

That's amazing! I'm glad for you

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Lol you've got a job with weekends.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Well, not so much a job as an apprenticeship that I'm payed for. But yea, I've only had to work Saturdays when I worked in retail.

[–] Okokimup 16 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] aulin 10 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

It's good that this came along, since the Cave Johnson monologue just reads like a Karen nowadays.

[–] AnUnusualRelic 6 points 10 months ago

When life gives you Karens, you just make karenade!

[–] ripcord 3 points 10 months ago

This is terrible business advice.

[–] undergroundoverground 10 points 10 months ago

"Unless life is also giving you sugar, your lemonade is going to taste like shit."

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

... is he making lemon-shaped piss bombs from those piss jars which are then vacuumed away for safe storage & times of need?

There might have been a mixup & life keeps accidentally giving me those lemons.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

When life gives you lemons, urine trouble.

[–] HootinNHollerin 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Battles have literally been won on avoiding scurvy. Can’t remember which side but Spainish armada vs England naval battles. Had spies report back they were eating sauerkraut and thus didn’t get scurvy. Hard to fight a war while sick

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago
[–] Katana314 4 points 10 months ago

Is that how it’s told now?
Is it all so old?
Is it made of lemon juice?
doorknob ankle cold