this post was submitted on 29 Apr 2024
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So our neighbors have been a growing problem for a few months now. They seem to be a flop house for six or seven people, most of them look high all day. They go out and Rev a Harley at 3am, they burn plastic been our houses in a fire pit, they have a new dog every two weeks because they keep getting out and getting hit by traffic in the busy street we live on, the current two have bit people. I'm not one to care how someone lives, but these folks make the rest of our slum neighborhood look downright utopian.

I've tried taking to them, they're stupidly hostile. I've put in complaints with the city, noise complaints with the police, they don't do anything about it. Does anyone have advice on dealing with this? I'm tired, at my wits end, and my small town tactics aren't as easy to pull off in a proper city.

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[–] [email protected] -3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

You move.

It's not up to you to control their behavior if it's not criminal.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Its so easy to say, move. The practical reality is often different. Also why the hell should they move if they aren't being obnoxious but the neighbors are. There's a certain level of decency that one should have in any setting. Being obnoxiously stupid to the point of doing all the things in OP's post makes people like that just fucking unacceptable or intolerable to live with. If people want to live like that then they should go live in the fucking wild. The rest of us actually want to live in civilized society.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Also why the hell should they move if they aren’t being obnoxious but the neighbors are.

You assume that OP is being entirely accurate in their descriptions, and that OP isn't doing shit that grates on his neighbors' nerves. That fact that it's bothering OP doesn't mean that OP has the right to dictate their behaviour. Taken to the illogical extreme, religious conservatives make exactly the same arguments against LGBTQ people being able to exist in public; when a transwoman is simply trying to exist, they're going to read it as obnoxious, antisocial behaviour.

The only way to universalize this is to say that unless their behaviour is directly, physically impacting OP--such as the dogs that are vicious--then OP needs to worry about themselves rather than what someone else is doing, as long as the neighbors aren't giving OP shit for whatever OP does.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I don't agree with the second sentence, but the OP's options are basically "live with it until they leave of their own accord" or "move yourself." The government will be no help here unless you know someone in it, especially if it's a large-ish town.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Please explain. How does OP have the right to dictate the bahaviour of other people when it's only an annoyance to them, rather than criminal or directly harmful?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Technically violations of noise ordinances are criminal, although they're usually minor misdemeanors. That would cover the bikes revving at 3am. The foul smells of plastic burning is probably also illegal.

Really this most of the rest of it covered under "don't be a dick." If someone's life's work is to be a dick, we should determine which people want to be dicks and put them in the dick section of town where they can all be dicks without anyone else complaining. It's just crazy to hear people sticking up for obvious assholes and being "MAH RIGHTS" about it.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It’s just crazy to hear people sticking up for obvious assholes and being “MAH RIGHTS” about it.

That's very literally what rights are all about, my dude. If you only had the right to peacefully protest when it was something popular, like bringing Firefly back to finish the series, then there wouldn't be any point to enshrining it as a right. Rights have to exist for everyone, even for truly awful people, or they aren't rights at all.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Look, your posting history says you're a reasonable person, and I respect that about you.

We're not talking people next door protesting some government action. We're not event talking about people doing something unpopular. We're talking about people who don't have the common courtesy to be a good neighbor. It's "I will do whatever the fuck I want whenever the fuck I want and if I'm bothering other people in my neighborhood then fuck them because no one tells me what to do." I live in an area where I regularly have to deal with people rolling coal and revving their engines because they want people to know the rules don't apply to them and no one is going to tell them what to do.

The old rule was "you right to swing your fist ends at my nose." After COVID it seems like the rule is "I'll swing my fist wherever the hell I want, and you had better get out of my way." The local PD has been quiet quitting ever since then unless they can harass some minorities.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

I understand your frustration with shitty neighbors. Really. Esp. since I lived on the west side of Chicago and had to deal with all of the nonsense that comes with it. (Although, honestly, the local gang wasn't too bad; as long as you weren't fucking with them and weren't a customer, they left you alone. Overall they seemed mostly like they were just trying to get by.)

But the problem is, where do you draw a line? Yes, OPs neighbors sound like antisocial assholes, based on how I perceive people, and how I live my own life. But if OP was a religious fundamentalist, then they would be framing things like an LGBTQ+ couple having a pride flag in the same kind of way, and claim that it was causing them the same distress to have obviously non-straight neighbors that were 'forcing their gay lifestyle on him', or were 'grooming children'. And it's quite reasonable to claim that flying a pride flag on your own property, or having a garden party with your LGBTQ+ friends on your own property, is a case where your neighbors shouldn't have any say at all over your conduct.

I don't like using concepts like 'common values' or 'community values' on things like this, because that's a very steep and slippery slope to redlining neighborhoods and institutional racism/sexism/etc. So I try to look for bright lines that you can apply in all circumstances. And it seems to me that, once you can point to a real, direct harm, then you have a solid case that it's reasonable to take action.

people rolling coal

This one bothers me personally as well, because it causes real, proven harms to the environment. Yeah, the individual effect is small, but the failure to enforce emissions laws in general--or to toughen them--is killing us.