this post was submitted on 23 Feb 2024
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[Outdated, please look at pinned post] Casual Conversation

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Having trouble phrasing this, so in case it's not clear I'm not looking for casual misogyny thanks

Having a debate with a friend about whether men shopping with women can be fun and I'm wondering how coloured my view of this is by me and my ex.

I'd love to hear what makes a great shopping experience for you with your friends or significant others!

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[–] elbucho 79 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (9 children)

I think it's not so much about the genders of the shoppers, but rather their approach to shopping that is most telling. I take after my mother: I'm a Combat Shopper. When I enter a store, I have a specific plan of action, and my goal is to execute it as swiftly and efficiently as possible and get out. My father, on the other hand, was very much a lookie-loo shopper. He would spend hours at the store slowly walking up and down every aisle trying to think if anybody he knew would want whatever bit of tat was on the shelves in front of him. Drove me fucking nuts to shop with him.

I think that combat shoppers can shop with other combat shoppers, and lookie-loo shoppers with others of their ilk, but pairing one with the other is a recipe for hurt feelings.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago

My take away from this is the phrase combat shopper

[–] Irinir 14 points 8 months ago (1 children)

This is my experience also. Me and the wife are both combat shoppers. We plan, we go in, cart blazing, we execute the plan, we get out and away. If either of us was the other kind of shopper, it wouldn't work really.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

@Irinir me and my partner are both normally combat shoppers as well. I think @elbucho's right.

There are certain shops (e.g some bookshops) where one or the other of us might want to looky loo and we generally leave each other to it.

[–] agent_flounder 12 points 8 months ago

My mode depends on what I'm shopping for and how much time is available, whether I feel like wandering, and whether I know the store at all.

Let's say I need, idk, a 6TB drive from Microcenter but I have like an hour to get it. Combat mode.

By contrast, this morning I felt like looking for some used blu rays at the thrift store and also felt like being a looky-loo.

If it is something we are both shopping for like garden decor, or we are there to browse like for antiques or furniture, then it's fun browsing.

I kind of feel like combat shopping is better solo. Unless the person can walk fast and help me find the thing if I don't have precise Intel on location.

Having another person could be redundant unless you don't know exactly what you want and need to compare and discuss a few candidate items.

[–] proudblond 9 points 8 months ago

Aaah, this describes me too. I particularly hate thrift shopping, because I always want something specific and the likelihood of finding it in a thrift shop is slim to none. I value my time more than a chance of monetary savings, I guess.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I vary between combat and lookeeloo, depending on the shop.

[–] slowwooderrunsdeep 5 points 8 months ago

I take after my mother: I'm a Combat Shopper.

My father, on the other hand, was very much a lookie-loo shopper.

There’s always two types of people, and they usually marry each other.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

I love this classification!

[–] weeeeum 3 points 8 months ago

What mode I'm in depends why I'm at the store. Am I getting specific items and GTFO or am I looking for a solution for a problem. I cook a lot so I know what I want and when I go to the grocery store, it's fast. If I'm looking for a solution, potentially to fix or remodel something I'll probably peruse through home Depot for some time.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Totally! You explained it really well.

My partner and I are the lookie-loo shoppers. We often cover stores aisle by aisle. It's entertaining for us for different reasons. We like to see what people are buying, especially things like books, clothes, etc. We like to talk about the products and the things that follow; for example, we start by noticing the variety of flavors in pets food and end up talking about animals, foods, etc. We like to learn about new products, as we are often out of the loop and it's nice to find new gadgets or kitchen accessories this way. We try new things, like "try me" lotions or whatever. Overall, it is a fun experience.