Yeah and I think part of why the joke annoys me is like, is that all some men think of themselves as? Like when I think of what I find particularly unattractive about men my first thought isn’t dick, it’s that smell that drives straight women crazy, it’s just such a turn off to me. There’s plenty else too, but like that joke is part of an entire class of shit that (particularly older) men say to lesbians that leaves me thinking they really need to talk to some people who are actually attracted to men about what they like, and to understand that in general even when I like the same part it being too masculine is not for me.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Very true. I'm bi and while I like dick it's not exactly the first thing that attracts me to men. I think in general the root of these kinds of jokes is the idea that deep down all women NEED men to be sexually satisfied, and a general assumption that lesbians are perpetually on the brink of "switching sides". Just more homophobia as per usual.

[–] captainlezbian 5 points 10 months ago

Yeah my favorite is the guys trying to assure us that they’re so masculine they can turn us and I’m just here like, if I absolutely had to sleep with a guy I’d pick the most feminine one I could.

And I think the real root of these jokes is insecurity in their value. If they value women for sex what value do they have to women who don’t want them for sex? And the answer is simple, it’s as a person. My friends that are men are my friends because they’re people I like to spend time with. And they’re of all orientations, but with the shared trait of being good guys. You can’t be so manly every woman wants you in bed, partly because some of us don’t want men at all but also because there are straight women and bi women who like their men effeminate or androgynous. Tastes vary so you’ll never be everyone’s type.