this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2025
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Falls seem to be the leading cause of death for Russians these days. Someone should look into this.
i have a friend who is the world's leading expert in knocking over old people (it's what her dissertation was about and now she works in that field) and a lot of falls are caused by poor vision (iirc it was like 70% of falls). granted she did not study the russian oligarchy in which case i'm confident she'd agree it's poor foresight.
Ah, they did. Sadly in investigator fell out of a window.
I just came up with a joke from this:
A Russian politician is found dead below an open window of his high rise condo. In investigative team comes in, but since it was a high-profile death, they are brought in one at a time by two large FSB agents.
The first one walks in, and says "clear signs of a struggle, with blood on the window catches. Also, the body below shows signs if damage other than the fall. Clearly, this was a mur-" and before he can finish, one of the burly FSB agents picks him up and throws him out the window.
The next comes in, sees the other investigator is nowhere to be seen, breaks into a sweat and looks down, seeing the two bodies. "P-please... don't murder me as..." and the FSB agent tosses him out the window.
The third walks in, looks around wordlessly. He calmly steps up to the window and looks down, seeing two investigators' and the politician's bodies. He shakes his head and sighs. "What a shame.
This appears to be a very popular suicide spot."
Why don't they just live in bungalows. Are they stupid? /s
Yeah, and Trump's ex wife too. Damn shame.
I believe the leading cause is drone strikes.