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First time I took amphetamines, it felt like a buzzing I'd had in my head all the time was suddenly gone and I could actually enjoy the quiet for the first time.
It was so great that I swore never to take them again, cause I knew I'd want to take them every day and get addicted.
10 years later I was diagnosed with ADHD. Turns out amphetamines just let me feel what it's like without symptoms for the first time.
Now I do take them daily (but at a much lower dosage).
My kids are convinced I have ADD, and are probably right, but having used amphetamines recreationally and enjoyed them too much I am afraid of the meds. I told the one still at home to hide them when she asked if I wanted to try the Adderall.
How is this going for you? I don't feel addictive in general, but speed? Oh my that is some good stuff.
Typically if you have ADHD then stimulants just make you feel "normal". Like, when I take my meds it just helps me stay on task and focus on what I want to focus on.
My non-ADHD friends who have taken the same meds recreationally have said they feel euphoric when they take them, which I do not get at all. For me it's just like... Strong coffee? (Then again, maybe lots of people are euphoric when they have their morning coffee?)
All this to say, get a real diagnosis, because there's a real chance that you don't have ADHD. Lots of other disorders can cause similar symptoms (e.g. chronic stress, generalized anxiety). Stimulants really fuck with your sleeping patterns which is absolutely terrible for yor health.
If I could hold a job without my meds I would probably stop taking them. I recently had to stop them temporarily due to another health issue and within 2 days my insomnia was gone and I was feeling healthier than I had in years. Yeah, it's been a lot harder to live my life, but I had forgotten how good a nice, deep sleep feels
Individual experiences can vary significantly. With sleeping pattern, for example: when I was on Vyvanse, I actually slept better than when I wasn't on medication; I fell asleep easier and felt more rested in the mornings. Strattera (a "non-stimulant"), on the other hand, had me waking hourly and having bizarre dreams.