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here are a few ideas I had:
Heh, several of your bullets can eat that full amount.
welp. if I ever become president then there goes the national debt
The lobbying stuff seems sensible.
The market cap of Alphabet/Google alone is an order of magnitude larger than your budget.
Offering bad politicians lots of money is probably a bad precedent. Also, depending on your definition, there's potentially a lot of them.
Free public transit, healtchcare are also significantly bigger than your budget.
So since that doesn't work - how about you buy a social media network, and get chummy with the corrupt candidate for president you push, then be part of a commission to destroy most sensible parts of the federal government. Also, build a creepy compound for all your children and their mothers.