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Ex-Incels, how did you dig yourself out? (poptalk.scrubbles.tech)

submitted 4 months ago by [email protected] to c/asklemmy

145 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I'm an ex incel myself, but I've been seeing a few users here exhibiting the tell tale signs. "I'm not attractive enough", "I don't socialize correctly", "I'll never find a woman" - all extremely unhealthy attitudes.

Personally I burned through many friendships and ruined a lot of chances with women because I was in the incel community. The community warped my view of women so much that I made it even harder to meet women, I became my own worst enemy. I lost friends because all I could think of was how horrible it was that they had girlfriends.

I have a friend who helped me out of it. She was the one who started calling out my bad behavior for what it was, and I started on the long uphill path out of it. I'm now married and stable for well over a decade, but I still think back to those days, and it depresses me seeing other people causing this themselves and not being aware of it.

So, Lemmy, for those who have clawed out of it, what's your story?

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[–] kromem 44 points 4 months ago (2 children)

"If you can't beat 'em, join 'em."

[–] [email protected] 35 points 4 months ago

Couldn't get a girlfriend so I became the girlfriend

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

"If you can't convince them, confuse them" also kinda works here..