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I took care of our young kids for a fortnight "instead of working" when my wife was rushed to hospital. It was far more exhausting than doing the day job. I don't know how single parents cope at all.
I'm sorry that you lived through that.
Kids take a lot of energy when everything is going well, so I can imagine the added stress plus no support from your partner make this situation extra hard.
I was thinking more in a normal scenario where my partner still help, but isn't the primary caretaker of the kids and home.
But yeah, taking care of kids alone and working? A feat of resilience for sure.