this post was submitted on 28 May 2024
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Just as the ducks at the park are free, there is also no legal requirement to answer the phone in particular way. Hit folks with a, "Ahoyhoy", "Howdy", "Whats good brother?", or for the more adventurous, "Ralphs Roadkill Cafe. You kill it, we grill it."
"Dave's pizza and abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce" is a particularly spicy one I've heard.
Jim's abortion clinic ... We deletus your fetus
Fetus Deletus was my favorite spell to cast at Hogwarts.
"You rape em, we scrape em"
(I do not condone this message)
I usually get people with: “Anons Morgue: you kill ‘em, we chill ‘em.”
In my family it was variations of "Hello, Joe's whatever. Insert rhyme here."
One of my favorites was "Joe's mortuary, you stab 'em we slab 'em."
My dad's go to is "Joe's Bar and Grill, this is Grill speaking". Sometimes he'll shake it up and answer as Bar instead
"Jimbo's Fish Fry; you hook 'em we cook 'em!"
Was always my favorite. Probably because I would love to take a restaurant a bucket of fresh-caught bluegill and come back in a couple hours to dinner. Filleting all those little bastards is a pain...
"You bag 'em, we tag 'em"
My go to is “Yellow”
Mine is somewhere between yellow and howdy. If you call a Texas Drunk you should be prepared for a "Yeowdy".
I usually hit my friends with the "sup fuckface"
I throw a fucko out there into the world every now on then
Snackbar Harry, Harry speaking
"Duffy's Morgue, you stab em we slab em."