this post was submitted on 10 Feb 2025
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Asklemmy

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[–] Nurse_Robot 12 points 21 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 21 hours ago

Step one: Post when zuck was skewing video counts to make people "pivot to video"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 15 hours ago

I die changing a CV axle.

How did they know I own a Subaru?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 12 hours ago

I got "How To Start Using Dropbox"

Too late, I win!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 12 hours ago

I die building a pigeon coop.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Initiative in D&D 5E

I die in a conflict where I tell a Wizards of the Coast zombie that Paizo and Pathfinder are the best, which, honestly, I should've seen coming.

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[–] zachimusprime44 3 points 16 hours ago
[–] donuts 12 points 22 hours ago (1 children)
[–] SkyezOpen 6 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Getting punched in the throat while trying to wall thump somebody is peak physical comedy.

[–] donuts 2 points 20 hours ago

Praying for death by snu snu..

[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 hours ago

"How to Detect Canine Hip Dysplasia"

Am I going to get sacked by a dog?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 17 hours ago

How to get prescribed Xanax

Seems legit

[–] tamal3 6 points 19 hours ago

Here, don't stop! It's endless scroll meets wiki: https://wikitok.vercel.app/

[–] foofiepie 7 points 20 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 20 hours ago

How to Combine Documents in Microsoft Word

I always suspected

[–] [email protected] 6 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 20 hours ago
[–] pleasejustdie 9 points 22 hours ago

I die in a freak hawk training accident.

[–] owenfromcanada 9 points 22 hours ago

I die cleaning a bicycle chain.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 19 hours ago

Phew, good thing I don't own a car and haven't driven for 13 years... Wait maybe this is the year πŸ‘€

[–] [email protected] 7 points 21 hours ago (1 children)
[–] davidgro 4 points 19 hours ago

Deathliest catch.

[–] theywilleatthestars 9 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)

I'm checking a microwave for leaks, how did the C4 even get in here?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 18 hours ago

So there I was Filing Adverse Possession in Texas, when suddenly the fountain pen (an OMAS Limited Edition) slipped and I stabbed myself in an artery, bleeding myself to death

[–] [email protected] 2 points 16 hours ago

https://www.wikihow.com/Boil-Sweet-Potatoes

I think I might be going on a quest in middle earth..

[–] [email protected] 6 points 21 hours ago

While searching for a Cherry Grove Blossom Biome in Minecraft?! How do they know that?! (βŠ™_β˜‰)

[–] sanguinepar 8 points 22 hours ago

Who knew that dying my brown hair blonde without using bleach could be so dangerous?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 22 hours ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 1 points 15 hours ago

https://www.wikihow.com/Transfer-Money-from-Wisely-Card-to-Bank-Account

I get domed by some credit company for trying to leave their no name service

[–] [email protected] 5 points 21 hours ago

So does the plant kill me or is there an aloe vera crime syndicate I got on the wrong side of?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 21 hours ago

Removing mold stains from wood flooring.

[–] Aurinia 5 points 21 hours ago

I guess from shrinking stomach

[–] [email protected] 3 points 19 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 15 hours ago

https://www.wikihow.com/Become-a-Shein-Ambassador

Surely, I just get so hopped up on my own farts from being an influencer, I start living the 'high life' and piss someone off to the point where they'll send a hit on me where they succeed and my public downward spiral ends up on CoffeehouseCrime YT as a case.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 19 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 21 hours ago

UPDATE REQUIRED PLEASE UPDATE ON GOOGLE PLAY STORE. So I guess I die from updates.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 21 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 16 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 22 hours ago

How to drop a gas tank.

Feels like a pretty reasonable way to go - I might even beat Elon to mars.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 20 hours ago

'How to treat a sprained neck'

So not sure if I'm the one with the neck injury or if I managed to get killed treating someone else

[–] [email protected] 3 points 21 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 17 hours ago

I guess that house wasn't abandoned

[–] LaminatedDenim 3 points 21 hours ago

Oh no, I'll die safely cleaning my playstation 5 :(

[–] [email protected] 3 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

"How to Clean Leather Sandals"

I don't own leather sandals and am not sure I know anyone who does, so that is very unlikely any time soon.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 18 hours ago

Oh hey, I was wondering, could you clean my sandals for me please? I stepped into something bad at that industrial plant over there, so be careful

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