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"det skiter jag högaktningsfullt i" - with care and respect, i am shitting into it.

"det ger jag inte ett korvöre/ruttet lingon för" - i would not give a sausage cent/rotten lingonberry for it.

"det ger jag själva fan i" - i give satan himself.

J’m’en crisse.

Romanian would be either "I'll put my feet in it" or "I'll put my dick in it"

Turkish: Not on my cock (Sikimde değil)

French Canadian: To chalice oneself

"Je m'en caliss"

"No me importa un pepino", I don't care about a single cucumber

"Me importa un pepino", shortened version, I care one cucumber, which is what OP was going by probably

This is missing the worst one to translate:

I have kama two.

It doesn't fully make grammatical sense in the original Estonian form either. The "have" part is also usually skipped, leaving just the noun case implying ownership over the kama

This is just one of many ways to say it in Estonian. We really are a nonfuckgiving people, except when we give too many of course. You can also say "I have clay" or "I have a (violin) bow". Of course these are just slightly rude (depending on tone and conversational partner), you can also say "doesn't ballsack me".

Should add the ex yugos. My dick hurts.

What are they doing in the Netherlands?

Rare french w

"I have it up my ass" (Polish).

Nr. 2 is awkward for people wanting to use manure on plants...