this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2024
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[–] FlyingSquid 34 points 1 month ago

Actually, it sounds like you were lawfully arrested.

[–] Grimy 30 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

No way he's getting 7 years just for using a passport as ID and not having plates. What did he do?

[–] BonesOfTheMoon 41 points 1 month ago

The "passport" is the fake American State National passport that they, no word of a lie, get from a moonshine distillery equipment website.

[–] FlyingSquid 19 points 1 month ago

I would be outstanding warrants are a part of it.

[–] Rhynoplaz 18 points 1 month ago

Soverie forgot to mention the pound of meth in the backseat.

[–] wjrii 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

10/01/24 some younger PD pulled me over and, YADDA YADDA YADDA, literally kidnapped me into their admiralty to sum it up.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

But you yadda yadda'd over the best part...

[–] wjrii 4 points 1 month ago

Unfortunately, I think our intrepid SovCit is all out of bisque.

[–] slickgoat 2 points 1 month ago

At least yadda yadda yadda made the most sense.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

well the police stopped him 7 times while he was driving

[–] Xaphanos 22 points 1 month ago

I really like this one. It takes us right up to the threshold of prison time. Icing on the cake would be a courtroom video, but I don't really need it. We all know how it goes.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (2 children)

They should just get specialists into court proceedings with these people to just bombard them with the most complex legalese in absolute detail.

[–] EleventhHour 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

They already do. They’re called “lawyers”

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I meant in addition to the lawyer ... the added specialist would just be some kind of academic with a great detailed knowledge of archaic laws and regulations who could just cite obscure codes, legalese, regulations and explanations going all the way back to Ancient Greece and the Babylonians - their job would be just to calmly answer back to the Sovcit with ever more complex explanations and jargon.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

I meant in addition to the lawyer ... the added specialist would just be some kind of

Mental health professional!

[–] EleventhHour 5 points 1 month ago

The sovcit would be the only one not listening, and who wants to go through all of that crap?

[–] rtxn 6 points 1 month ago

Doesn't work. Trying to parse a sentence that is more than ten words in length, their brain would just throw an OutOfMemoryException, output a bunch of "I do not consent" lines, and immediately return to the index page of Black's Law Dictionary.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Sucks to suck.

[–] kikutwo 7 points 1 month ago

Take out this trash.