this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2024
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How... do you go about getting diagnoses as an adult? I am 38 years old and relatively well adjusted, I think?. Career, home, family, degrees. But I always just thought I was just, idk, wierd, but I have learned to occasionally point my hyperfixation in a constructive direction. It is always fixated somewhere, getting through school, my job, but whatever I am fixated on, it is the only thing that matters in the whole world. I graduated at the top of my class with a 4.0 and all the awards and accolades possible. I am a high level supervisor at my work, etc. Like, I am doing OK, but other times I will get distracted, and for a month my fixation will be a video game, or my fish tank and my work will suffer. Once I lose interest I would rather put my head through a fucking wall than deal with the details of something I no longer care about. Even if other people depend on me to finish something it is pulling teeth for me to finish it. All it gets is a superficial level of attention. None of the passion. My life is a series of rabbit holes and half finished projects. For me I am fine, but the people around me that get neglected when I am on to something else.... if I am focused on my job, it consumes me, every waking second I am either at work, talking about work, working on stuff for work, getting another certification for work, and I am terrified if I try to refocus to try to maintain some sort of work life balance I will lose any reasonable interest in work and everything I have done will be for nothing.
Writing it out I feel far less "adjusted" than I thought... my wife has pointed it out for years how it actually affects me, (and her, and the kids) more than I realize. Sometimes I get in the threads in this sub and I have a "Oh, shit..." moment where I realize so many of my own patters relate to the comments in here and wonder what life would be like if I actually took care of it. I was diagnosed when I was like 7 but it was never followed through with or treated. IDK. ๐คทโโ๏ธ
Are you me?
I finally asked my wife to find someone to discuss it with. Scheduling appointments is so difficult for me, let alone finding who I'm supposed to see, whether that's a vet, a doctor, or a mechanic. I imagine you can Google (or duckduckgo) "Adhd doctor near me" or something
Anyway, I only take meds on the days that I need to be productive, but same story. On those days it feels like I snuck a cheat sheet into a test. The same kind of "this is just how most people live? You can just get shit done?"
My hobbies used to be collecting hobbies. CBT helped me realize that, and now I know when to pull back before I jump 10000% into a flavor of the month. I still get interested in things, but I give myself a 72-hour cooldown before purchasing anything new for a hobby. If I'm still interested after that, I dip my toes in. I more often than not realize it's just a fixation and save myself a ton of time and money that I can put towards my long-term goals.
If you feel you might have adhd you would want to start with getting a diagnosis. Usually, through a psychiatrist. From there, they can work on a treatment plan.
So can I start with something a little milder or do I need to jump straight in to CBT? I guess I was expecting to ease into things with maybe some light spanking or candle wax.
Don't neglect the balls.
I basically talked to my regular doctor about it and he asked me a few questions before agreeing that I have ADHD and prescribing me meds. I didn't realize that was uncommon until I mentioned it too someone else though.